https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sij16VKQL2M

1 00:00:00.000 --\> 00:01:00.000 in this video i'm gonna break down one
of the stories that impacted my life the most and hopefully how you can
learn from it so i wasn't that great of a person when i graduated high
school i think i was really self-centered it was always about me and
what everyone could do for me everything i wanted was just like respect
and status and maybe that hasn't changed i've just gotten better at it i
don't know i want to share with you a conversation that changed my life
if you don't know i am my name is ashmosey own acquisition.com it's a
portfolio of companies of 85 million a year and i have nothing to sell
you this particular story was after my first semester of college i went
to an all guy school in high school and i went to vanderbilt for my
undergrad and i had acquired a pretty bad reputation in my opinion in
high school by being kind of uh promiscuous for lack of utter term i you
know i was known as a womanizer and i just didn't generally have a very
good reputation at least one that i wasn't proud of and so when i went
to college i was like okay it's my chance to start fresh and it's a much
bigger school so you know my transgressions won't be as known because
there's way more people and the first you know three months of my
college career i did everything that i

2 00:01:00.000 --\> 00:02:00.000 was doing in high school on steroids i
did more of everything i drank more i went out more i ended up having a
one i think a one nine gpa going inside i basically had these report
cards from my teachers that were like halfway through the first semester
that were sent home that were like your son is failing basically every
class and so my dad called me up and was like if you're gonna do this
like you can do this it's here for free and not do this at college right
and so i went home and i was like how do i get these people to stop
talking all the smack like there was this thing back in the day called
juicy campus which was like a gossip form it ended up getting shut down
because there was so much hate on it but there was like this massive
massive threat about me and how i was just like a total womanizer and
all the stuff i felt horrible you know i mean you can imagine like the
younger version of yourself that's really sensitive to like what
everyone says about you and so i i just went to my dad and i was like
how do i change what they're saying how do i get them to say good things
and it sounds to say this now but what he said to me changed my life and
he looked at me in the eyes and he was like why are you trying to change
people's

3 00:02:00.000 --\> 00:03:00.000 perception of you when you can just
change who you are and let their perceptions catch up the only way
you're going to change your reputation is by being different he's like
you need to stop being this person that does all these things and your
reputation will catch up and even if it doesn't you'll always know i and
honestly it barely scratched the surface because my ego was so high and
i was like no i just have to think of a better way to like market myself
but i ended up knowing that he was very serious about the threat of
pulling me out of school if i didn't get my grades up and so what i
ended up doing for the next half of the semester of my first semester
freshman year is i didn't go out at all i didn't drink anymore i really
didn't like hang out with girls at all and all i did was study and i was
able to pull my it might have been 1-2 it was very low up to a 3.2 for
the semester which basically meant i got an a on everything from that
point for the rest of the semester and so when i went back home he was
like well now you know you can do it and so we should always expect that
that is what you're going to get from here on out and it also kind of
proved it to myself too i was like i guess i can do this and you know
what happened is after i started switching that way people still thought
of me as a

4 00:03:00.000 --\> 00:04:00.000 and i still had to deal with that it
took like two years to really reverse the reputation that i had acquired
in the first three months i think during that period of time i grew an
appreciation for how easy it is especially in first impressions to set
the wrong one and how hard it is to overcome a negative impression and
my reputation overall the realization i had was there's too many people
that you're interacting with in the world to try and curate reputation
the only way to change your reputation is to change who you are
reputation is fundamentally just what people say about you to your face
and behind your back i'm not saying that you need to care about what
everyone else thinks that's not really the point of this it's much more
if one person says you're an whatever if every person you know says
you're an like you might be an and so if you have one of those
situations where you feel like the proof or the evidence is overwhelming
and you might even believe it then it's probably you i think that for me
getting out of the whole like i can control this and try and curate what
people think about me and transitioning to be like at the end of the day
i'm the only person who knows who i am and i

5 00:04:00.000 --\> 00:05:00.000 don't like who i am and just saying
like well how can i get to a point where i would like me even if
everyone else hated me how can i like me when i started operating from
that place it really changed my life because then i started thinking
like what version of me do i want to be and what does that guy do well
that guy studies really hard and that guy works out really hard and that
guy's a really good friend he's always respectful doesn't have an ego
and it took me a long time but i still work on this stuff you know even
i'm not saying i'm done by any any search imagination but i think that
if you can simply shift the perspective of like i'm going to try and
appear this way to like i want to be this way if it just so happens to
get captured great and if it doesn't great and there's this this quote
by epictetus that i'm probably gonna butcher but he says if you need
someone else to tell you something about yourself you are out of
integrity because you can always be your own witness i think that that's
a great point to wrap the this little video lesson up with because that
piece strikes to the core of everything

6 00:05:00.000 --\> 00:06:00.000 which is we are our own witnesses and
if we want to change our reputation we need to change our reputation
with ourselves first and then eventually it will reflect in the world
and this has just been very telling for me because like more and more
people recognize me every day when i'm walking around and i'm like jeez
like i don't have any room for having a bad day like if i'm out to
dinner and like i'm just like not concentrating and i'm short with the
waiter and the waiter recognizes me then you know he's like this guy's
an or whatever and so i guess in some ways it's like you can pretend
like you're famous because you are to yourself and so i will leave you
with that mozzie nation if you're new to the channel welcome lots of
love and i'll see you guys next video bye
