https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MTAXjVgK-1o&t=557s&ab_channel=LewisHowes

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i think the single greatest
differentiator between
the poor and the middle class middle
class and rich rich and the truly
wealthy
is i think you gotta have a dream the
school of greatness
please welcome
now what's the difference between
someone who's
selling all the time and someone who's
never selling and doing a disservice
because they don't offer
someone to buy something when they know
like okay i have this coaching program
or this course or this thing where i
know you can get value if you took
action but maybe they shy away from it
because they want to focus on brands so
much and not be the sales person
but then it's actually doing a
disservice yes because they're not in
your program so i think it actually has
less to do with the ratio of how much
they're selling versus
serving in their content
but more so the ratio of selling and
serving overall because most times
because of this like we were talking
before this about the internet marketing
space in general is that most people's
products are not serving they're not
terrible right they're terrible and so
what happens is like it is the most
right hook of right hooks possible

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because like you just lose a ton of
goodwill with the thing apple doesn't
lose goodwill when they come out with an
iphone everyone's just excited about it
and they use the iphone they tell their
friends
so the difference is in the goodwill
that comes with the quality of the
product and so i think that's where the
issue is it's not like do i sell or do i
not sell it's just is the thing that i'm
selling and the vast majority of people
are pitching all the time are natural
promoters not product people right and
so like most times the greatest product
people like naval had this quote that i
really like he said you're only selling
because you don't know how to market and
you only market because you don't know
how to build a product
because like the best products market
and sell themselves now obviously if
you're steve jobs or elon musk it's like
you build amazing products and then you
back them with unbelievable marketing
and then you have an army of sales
people that that you know are selling
for you so it's like then you have them
all and then you have you know a
trillion dollars yeah yeah yeah but like
just just being exceptional any of those
will make you money but you get the
multiplicative you know compounding
effect if you're good at two or three of
them right were you always

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uh good at making money or was there a
time where you were like man i'm just
broke struggling and trying to figure
this thing out
it depends on like how much we're
defining you know i mean like right out
of co i finished i finished college in
three years and then did the management
consulting path and so like out of
college i was making like 50 000 right
right um and i lived in baltimore so
like my cost of living was like five
dollars and so
so i was able to save a bunch of money
so i i saved fifty thousand dollars in
two years wow living there and that's
what i was able to start my my uh gym
with did you understand
money when you were in your teens or
growing up or did you feel like you were
scared of it or it was scarce
or are you thinking oh this i'm not
really worried about money it'll come
when i'm ready
i was always i've always been a saver
i've always been a saver not a huge
spender
i i think part of it is because i don't
get a lot of like when i pay a dollar i
feel something different and most times
if i buy something i don't feel any
different so i don't get a lot of
utility spending right i just don't get
a lot from it i think i've been aware of
that for a long time and so like if you

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don't spend a lot and you make even a
normal amount of money for a decent
amount of time you end up having a lot
um and my my income went up i would say
that there's definitely elements of
scarcity that i
that i just believed in for a long time
really yeah i mean around competition
was one tell me about it what was that
about so like when i had you know when i
had my gyms for example this is you know
almost a decade ago you know i was so
concerned with the guy down the street
was
marketing is he copying my ads like i
used to get so obsessed with this stuff
and like
it just so doesn't matter like at all
like you
he could copy
and we could both have really big
successful gyms it's not like there's a
lack of people who need to get a chance
right right
and then even then it's like we're only
talking about a five-mile radius not
like the rest of the world like it's
there's just like you know orders of
magnitude of thinking in terms of scale
that i was just like completely like
aloof what happens when we focus on
competition so much what happens to our
ability to scale grow our creativity our
money-making abilities i think you

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become emotionally reactive to the
activities of the other person and so
you're truly focused on nothing that
adds value
and so it's because of it's not the
competition like competitors don't put
you out of business but you obsessing
over competitors does right what should
people be doing instead of obsessing
over competition it's all customers it's
all just being because like if you can
get
you know there's a billionaire in my in
my building who um he was asking anybody
he's like if you had one thing that you
could tell someone uh if they wanted to
build you know a company like yours and
he said your customer must absolutely
love your product a lot of people just
underestimate the amount of effort it
takes to go from good to great
uh in product or service it's like
if you've ever been to like the
difference between a five-star
restaurant and a four-star restaurant
you know looks like 20 percent but it's
10 times the effort you know what i mean
the difference between like a one
michelin star and a two michelin star
restaurant is an ocean right right and
so i think
like i use the book as the example
because it's an easy one to reference
most people try and just write a book

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and then once the final word is done
they're like send it to the editor edit
it cool and let's ship it out but like
that book i rewrote five times end to
end the whole thing and each time the
goal was to make it shorter it's like
how can i say this in fewer words how
can i say this in less words and um
and in doing that and the same thing
happened with jim launch with that
product is that every time we created a
2.0 or 3.0 or 4.0
we made it shorter how could we make it
easier to consume and then also that was
the reason we wrote the book about the
value equation it's like what is value
right how do we define that and so if
we're customer focused we can obsess on
value and then have a very iterative
approach and i think that you came from
the internet marketing world like and i
talked i i've given this in like a
couple of like closed door masterminds
where i'm like guys like you all say
that your product's amazing i'm like
what's your crc what's your chs what's
your nps scores what are your ttvs and
they're like huh i'm like well if i ask
you your cpm your cpl your your cost per
book call your cost of acquisition like
all of these things you could rather
lose off in two seconds and like so you

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guys say that your product's amazing and
yet you don't measure a single metric
around product wow and so focusing on
that right yeah so they just so the
thing is like if we can get that part
right then you get so much
si because if we can just get each
customer to get one more customer
then we get our
our return on ad spend doubles right but
then if you think about what your
contribution margin is on that extra
customer if you don't have to spend the
cost of acquisition
so much of that drops to the bottom line
and then the company just becomes so
much more profitable yeah just by like
tiny levers that we do here like how can
we take you know with i think we were
talking earlier about our publishing
business
we're like okay publishing is something
that takes a long time to do
how can we figure out ttv is time to
value so how can we figure out some sort
of experience or some sort of win
someone can have in the first seven days
like how can we get them a dollar is
there anything that we can do to
launching their book yeah exactly like
something some proof of concept and we
were able to figure out how to we're
talking about mini you know minibook get
that going in a very short period of
time so that people could just and we're
like hey guys this is an mvp this isn't
your perfect product we just want to

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prove to you that it works and so then
they get one dollar in their account
they're like and we're like you are now
getting some momentum yeah yeah and now
you have that identity shift that
happens just like i just made money on
the internet like yeah you did
now let's do a real book that's like
really good like we don't this is not
the product but this is proof of concept
and so that was like a a more creative
one we had to do but like in other
businesses it's like how can we always
drag forward at least some sort of big
win so we get the emotional buy-in to
then fin you know fall through like when
we had the gyms way back in the day i
would run people through like a six week
really aggressive diet in the beginning
and that was because even though the
sustainable weight loss
is it takes a much longer period of time
you know etc the slower you lose it the
longer it sticks off
but the faster you lose in the beginning
the more likely you are to stick with it
interesting so you get this emotional
buy-in and you're like cool okay we just
did a lot of weight loss in six weeks i
need you to chill for six right and then
but now they believed us because we had
just delivered you know a big win kind
of results exactly quickly yeah and so
it's like we know how to do it but now

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we're like you can trust that we do know
how but now let's just maintain for six
weeks get your hormones back make sure
everything's good hunky dory but a
little more muscle because you lost them
during this kind of aggressive cut yeah
and then kind of then we'll get into a
more sustainable phase right so it's
just how can we drag that forward and i
think that level of obsession the way
people obsess about promotion if they
obsess the same way about product the
amount of profit they would make as a
result of that
is just like it's huge and those are
sellable businesses the marketing driven
businesses do not have nearly the
enterprise value that the product driven
businesses do so would you say the key
to going from good to great is obsessing
on product great product greatness 100
what is what if someone you know they
have any product the physical product
digital product coaching is software and
they're watching and listening
what should they be thinking about to
making the product that much better
they've put a lot of time and energy
launching and building it they've got
sales
maybe they've had it for a year or two
how do they break it all down and it
says is it 20 different factors is it
like just do these three things and it's
going to improve the quality of product

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what should they think about it's a
really good question so there's like
three different angles i want to take
so one is like what i talked about in
the book which is like the value
equation so what it's like so there's
four variables in the value equation the
first one is the dream outcome which is
is the thing that i'm delivering
fundamentally valuable and this is
especially for people probably more so
who are trying like starting out in
their in their like entrepreneurial
career you want to map draw it out for
me too if you want to sure well hold it
up for people yeah so you've got you've
got your dream outcome so i'll just put
dream here
right you've got dream outcome which is
the first variable
the second variable is the perceived
likelihood of achievement
and so the idea is and i'll give you an
example of this if you have let's say
you wanted to get plastic surgery
whatever
and is that what you did with your
calves
that's exactly right
if if you wanted to get plastic surgery
and you had the option of two guys who
are gonna do the surgery one guy is done
ten thousand surgeries and one guy is
fresh out of medical school this is his
first surgery which guy would you go
with probably ten thousand it might even
take this guy half the time to do the

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surgery is this guy and double the price
right so we might and it's double the
price why because of the perceived
likelihood of achievement we believe
that when we pay this man we are more
likely to achieve what we want even
though the work is the same probably
longer on this side but our perception
of what we are going to get in a real
way increases prior to purchase which is
the same reason that if you have like 20
people who told you that this restaurant
is amazing you're willing to pay way
more even though you haven't experienced
it yet because it's the perceived
likelihood of getting the outcome to
rewind on the dream outcome uh this is
more a commentary that how is it that
you have a 50 000 you can you can solve
the same problem let's say weight loss
because everybody understands that one
if i'm trying to help somebody lose
weight there's 50 000 solutions and
there's five dollar solutions there's
free solutions right 50 000 solutions
you can get liposuction right and get a
full body lift and whatever in a day
right
or you can get an ebook you know for
five bucks so the question is why are
these two things you know more valuable
and that again goes to perceived
achievement but if i went from the
weight loss to let's say making money

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if i had two things in general all the
things in the making money category will
be will be priced higher because there's
a more direct roi yeah so that's why
between categories stream outcome as a
category can be higher or lower but then
once you're within a category it's the
other three variables so perceive
likelihood of achievements number one of
the other three variables the next
variable is underneath which is the
time delay so between when i pay and
when i get
what's my delay there right so if i were
to say using the weight loss example if
you swipe your credit card and you look
down at your stomach and you just have
abs
how valuable you'll pay a lot for that
exactly and all we did was just decrease
the time delay and so let's say in a b2b
example if you had a marketing agency
for example and normally it's like okay
you guys need to send me all this
creative and we got to get everything
spun up and it's going to take us you
know 45 days to really get everything
you know ramp we got to build a funnel
and handle apollo out right and then
let's do a different example we're on
the same call the guy says cool we're
going to get you going and you hang up
the phone and your phone rings with the

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prospect
that's pretty big even if it's the exact
same thing the pr 45 days from now your
phone rings the prospect today your
phone rings the prospect how different
is the perception of value
phenomenally different which is why the
time delay is such a huge piece which is
why time to value we're referencing
earlier is such a huge part of
increasing the perceived value of the
product
and so that's the time delay that's the
third yep and then the fourth one is
effort and sacrifice and so effort and
sacrifice are two sides of the same coin
so effort as i define it are things that
you must begin doing that you do not
want to do that you did not have to do
prior to the purchase
give me an example if i have to wake up
early to go to the gym that would be
effort that is something that i now have
to do
and so sacrifice i use as the equal
opposite which is what do i have to stop
doing that i want to do yeah that i that
i would continue to doing continue doing
if i didn't have to stop eating
milkshakes at midnight yes and even in
the b2b example with the marketing
agency well now what do i have to do i
have to start making this content i have
to start hopping on meetings every week

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we have to start looking over these
metrics like the higher these people i
got to worry about right and so
oftentimes especially like businesses
they think that their price is the most
expensive thing that they have in the
cost and it's not so think about this if
you've ever asked someone hey i'll give
you my service for free and they said no
it's because there are other costs that
you're not taking to consideration which
also means a lot of times your price has
far more wiggle room in it than you
think it does and if you can decrease
a much bigger hidden cost
by asking for more money and you can
solve a hidden cost you can make more
money and improve their experience at
the same time right and that's when you
just make oodles and noodles of money
when does someone
know so this is a good degree concept
right what we should be focusing on is
kind of these this main
analogy and factor when does someone
understand
a lot of people talk about their worth
like i'm worth this i deserve this
whether they're an employee or they're
an entrepreneur and they want to price
something yeah
when

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should they be thinking about their
worth and
increasing their rates whether as an
employee or as an entrepreneur how do
they know because you're only worth what
people are willing to pay so how do you
get people to
pay what you believe you're worth
so
i think there's three variables that
come into like how much you can charge
right
the first one is value or perceived
value from the prospect value
so perceive value the second one is how
good you are negotiating which would
become which i put that are persuading
you could probably put that as just
persuasion in general that's because if
it's if it's a job you might be
negotiating if it's a customer you might
be negotiating to but it's persuasion in
general and that's a whole skill to
develop on its own 100 and the third one
is um
how unique it is so that there's no easy
alternative
right and so if like for example let's
say i provide something that's really
valuable i'm unbelievable at selling
rare and then another guy is willing to
just do all the same stuff for just less
right right and so it's being

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de-commoditized let's talk about in the
book too is that people have to be able
to they cannot and the goal should be
with our our services that we have that
no one can hold up our service and
somebody else's and say these two are
similar enough i'll pick the cheaper one
and so the goal is how can we
differentiate ourselves in enough ways
by looking at the value equation and
thinking what are all the things that
are making this take longer and how can
i remove them what are all the efforts
and sacrifices even these micro things
these nuances that make things more
difficult and so like the kings of this
if you look at uh like amazon right like
the biggest companies in the world
i'll reverse the small companies that
are out there they always focus on the
first two things let me let me promise
something really big let me show you all
these testimonials and that's all they
do just promote these things it's
amazing
listen to sammy it's amazing listen to
tommy right that's all they do
but the biggest companies in the world
focus on the bottom side of the equation
which is how can we make things faster
and how can we make things more
effortless like netflix destroyed
blockbuster not because they
fundamentally changed the product at all
all they did was they made it happen
immediately and from the comfort of your

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home right and so they just dramatically
decreased the cost and effort that was
associated with watching movies and boom
they blew up right and so like uh jason
fladley and he's a friend he said you
know one of the easiest business models
in the world is just look at what
everyone else is doing and do it in half
the time
right like that it's a simple like
people like what do i do for business
just look what like if someone you know
like can cut your lawn in whatever
amount of time you clean houses so you
can clean houses in less time because
it's just less inconvenience when when
people when you're there in their house
less time and less money or same money
same money yeah or more money you know
like it depends on what are the what are
the hidden costs so like probably like
with cleaning what are they hitting what
are all the things that people hate
scheduling is probably a pain right uh
hearing the noise is probably a pain
like silent cleaners right
right like what are like you you list
this out and that's we outlined that in
the book of like the process of thinking
through this but what are all the pains
and problems that your customers
complained to you about and so like the
goal is always in in the support tickets
so when you talk about like obsessing
about a customer right it's let's go

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through all the comments on the videos
right let's go through all of the
support tickets that are coming in and
those complaints inside of the
complaints sure like
what you don't want to do is say like
well these guys are all victims because
then you lose all the power as a
business owner by just blaming them
so if you just accept all of it it's
like these are all like as long as the
thing that they're saying is not false
if it's unreasonable then let's see if
we can figure it out maybe no one else
has figured out how to do this but we
might as well try yeah right and so i
think if if you can approach it with
like very open hands of like when you
accept the feedback it gives you the
goal to really create huge breakthroughs
in products and services were you always
open to the feedback from customers or
when did you learn to be like when did
you learn to be like okay
this sounds like a victim conversation
but there's something here where this
person's struggling and if i can make it
more effortless it's gonna be a better
product for that person
i think it's just taken time and i think
it's because i think a lot of it i think
is um is really beating down your ego
and i think like in a lot of ways with

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business in my opinion ego is the enemy
because it gives us too much confidence
when we don't deserve it
when did you start beating down your ego
i mean i've been trying to do it since i
was 19.
um it's just been a very slow process
i just i just realized that it was the
root of all the unhappiness that i had
and like everything that i had was in
comparison to other people with for no
reason and like you know i've obviously
adopted some perspectives we'll probably
get into later but that are contrarian
in nature in terms of like how we live
but not
just
there's no benefit to ego
there's just none and then i have a
different thing that i've been thinking
about recently i'm excited to share with
you sure um so there's you've probably
heard this but there's a lot of evidence
that points to with mitochondrial dna
that we go back to like one one woman
birthed like the mitochondrial dna of
all humans just comes like tracks back
to one one woman right
and so i think that that's interesting
within the context of legacy because
people talk about legacy and they want
to like
like leave something for their for their
progeny
and we we love our

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sideways family members right
what do you mean like oh yeah yeah like
you're a family yeah exactly
but like if we all came from the same
mitochondrial dna right
then
then we like not to be like weird and
huggy huggy love you but like family 100
yeah of course i find that really
fascinating it's just like it's like a
super distant cousin and and this is why
that's why when i met you for the first
time yeah what did i do when i met you
deep long hug deep long hug oh yeah and
i'd do this was a triple hug it was a
triple because you you i i broke you up
twice i was like bring it in bro
there's a reason i do that is because um
oh that's the thing i didn't know well i
mean i i mean that's a
unless it's somewhere where it's like
maybe someone who's older that doesn't
want to be hugged or you know your wife
i'm going to give a quicker i'm not
going to be grabbing so yeah
but it's uh you know it's a respectful
you know understanding the human being
in front of you doing your best to
respect it but with you i knew i could

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just hug you and it's going to make you
uncomfortable
and it's going to make you uncomfortable
but but for me i don't know if i'm ever
going to see you again i don't know if
i'm going to see you tomorrow or or
anyone tomorrow totally and so why not
embrace people with you know a three to
five 10 second awkward hug yeah and let
people know that you really appreciate
the moment when you're present yeah
that's what i try to do that's what i
try to focus on but um you know and if
we're all distant cousins yeah then why
not treat each other that way the best
way possible you know and i didn't and i
didn't mean to launch all the way there
because i'll go right back to ego so i
can screw this back otherwise we'll go
in that direction um but yeah so i think
because all this comparison is like well
if i were comparing myself to a family
member would i feel the same way and if
if all these people were on the same
side as me because we're all family
would i still feel like i would because
i've just tried to attack it from a
logical perspective of like how many
different ways can i try and defuse this
bomb and i think there's a lot of keys
and you just unlock tiny pieces of it
and you can just
uh try you know piece by piece i don't
think anyone ever conquers it but yeah
or you know
just hopefully i can over time get

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better and this i used to be very
competitive as well as an athlete that's
all i thought about was winning it's
like i had to win to feel like i was
worthy or i was good enough or i was
talented enough or and if i didn't win
that i wasn't reaching my goal of
winning the championship or the prize or
whatever it was
and i took that into business for many
years and i felt like i needed to
compete with other people and then it's
funny when i started this show
almost 10 years ago i was like it can't
be about me it needs to be about
collaboration yeah in order for this to
really grow and scale and change lives
and impact people it can't just be
the lewis house show all day long yeah
one i'm not smart enough i don't have
all the answers i'm not as talented as
you shorter guys are way smarter
that's why you're so much more brilliant
um you know and i was like i got to
bring on the smart people and create a
safe space
i could bring all the tall guys off
right now i'll just catch it right like
everything all my audience will get
taller as a result
but uh it's funny because when i started
to shift that the eagle goes back into

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still comparing and ranking some of
these things and i was like okay when i
started to shift that
it's when
i you know the platform and the
community started to expand because i
made it about shining the light on
others yeah you know and doing my best
to shine the light on others and when
you do that when you shine the light on
an idea or a mentor that taught you
something usually good things come back
so
that's interesting so when did you start
to shed this ego mentality
i mean i started attacking when i was
19. 19. how are you now 32 32. yeah um
and i think i have like 40 percent less
ego than i did
yeah so and how do you have
how do you diminish the ego as you
continue to scale and exit these big
companies and build your brand and get
more and more attention and known how do
you
bring it back down to the humility i
think it's linking the two
so it's trying to link these good things
are happening because i'm decreasing
this thing that's smart and so that way
i can associ i can have a positive
reinforcing association with the success

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that actually that would normally
amplify you know the wrong character
yeah what do you think would happen if
your ego
was at the highest level right now i
think a lot of people would i mean a lot
more people would not like it like i
mean i don't think the message would get
across because to be fair i think the
message would
stop
it would the spread would happen much
slower or not at all because the message
would change because the message
wouldn't be about the message it would
be about me
and i think that i think that probably
the reason that this has grown so much
is because you've you've tried to quiet
yourself in
so that the message and the idea can
spread to as many people as possible and
you put the message on the pedestal
rather than lewis on the page of course
and i think your audience realizes yeah
that's interesting so what do you think
you were making 50k the first couple
years out of college
you saved 50k within two years which is
amazing so you were disciplined yeah
what was the
the habit or the switch from one year to
the next
that started to bring in more abundance

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financially not in a incremental 20 but
it was like boom this was 5x 10x what
was that habit or mindset shift for you
that started to develop more income so
um there's like the the science and the
art kind of both sides so like the
science side is just the leverage so the
amount of money you make is proportional
the amount of leverage you employ in
your life and so you know four types of
leverage this is not mine this isn't of
all robicons but i'll just say that yeah
so you've got labor i call collect i use
four c's because it's easier for me to
remember he says labor i say
collaboration so funny that you said
that earlier yeah but it's just getting
other people to basically use their time
right for your cause
the second level of leverage is other
people's money is getting people to
invest in your thing
and then the next two are so these two
are permissionless the first one's like
you need to get someone's permission to
work for you and you get someone's
permission to get you give you their
money the other two are permission lists
so you can do them on your own one is
media which is what you have here
because the cost of making one video and
having one person see it versus a
million people see is the same cost yeah
right and then the other is code right

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so i say content in code so there's my
four c so collaboration capital content
code and both of those are not binaries
it's not
am i using other people am i not using
other people it's to what extent am i
using other people am i do i use other
people's money yes or no no it's how
much of other people's money am i using
and so each of these are continuums not
binaries so like somebody could just use
other people's money and be a
billionaire because of the extent they
use it but those are the types of
leverage that exist and so
as my income went up it was by
proportion of the amount of leverage i
was employing really how are you what of
these four were you leveraging the most
so in the beginning i had no leverage
because i was an employee right i was
using my own time the next thing that i
started doing was i became self-employed
right so i had a little online training
business that i started in between my
quitting my job and and starting the gym
um and so when i started the gym i
started getting labor was the first
people yeah not a lot of it but i got
some of it and so that gave me that
first next year i went from part-time
interns
a month to i think about 30 000 a month
um so that was the that was the big jump

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is just i had a team you know i made a
small team but i had a team right now
that's overall in revenue that's not
your take no exact sales you might have
been losing money yeah right
we made we i made a i made i was
probably making 20 000 a month at that
point for yourself yes after expenses
and team and everything yeah that was
then and then what did that feel like
going from 5 to 20. did that make you
feel something different was there a
shift inside of you when you took that
action because for me when i started
this it was all about vanquishing my
father so it was all about
i was middle eastern father only child
so like i was raised by a single dad it
was just me and him that was it for the
vast majority of my life and so he's
middle eastern came here the thousand
dollars became a doctor he was a doctor
came here learned english from watching
television you know what i mean has the
american success story absolutely that's
amazing and so i was born here though
speaking on the language too french was
my first actually there's a whole story
around it but anyways but yeah french is
here yeah how many languages you speak
that's the best one i
i'll just leave it at that

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but all of it was about making him proud
right um
that's what you did you set out to do
that that's what i was trying to do and
then i think that throughout my like
adolescence i realized that it was
something that was always going to be
withheld from me so it didn't matter
what it was the goal post would always
move so that it would never be proud
enough right it was just it was because
he wanted the most out of me and so like
if i got let's say you know a 99 on a
test it wasn't congratulations what'd
you get wrong oh man right and that was
always what it was that's okay like i'm
yeah we're cool i'm very happy with my
life yeah yeah and i realized that and
so this desire to gain approval turn
into a very deep anger
and so towards the world him yourself
other people mostly him mostly him um
and most like him and myself probably
split probably 50 50. you know
and um and so it was like my earlier
i'll say quote success
was purely
fueled by rage like it wasn't it wasn't
like it was it was rage you know what i
mean i was in the same boat yeah yeah
and it was like and i but there was

29
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probably some element of me that's like
almost enjoyed the suffering because
then like i just would get in the space
when when you ask like how did i feel
yes by getting the extra 20 000 a month
first my goal was to
make as much as my dad
and then it was to make more than my dad
and then it was to make more than my dad
had ever made his whole life
wow and so once i had done that
the
the
i wanted the success to be
unquestionable like yeah it couldn't
there couldn't be a but there couldn't
be an asterisk it had to be so
undeniable
that
that vanquishing was the word right and
so
for a five year period after i quit my
job my dad did not support he didn't
support me quitting my job why not
even though they were making money and
building a business and because
he didn't he's like you're what are you
a gym owner like he's like you went to
vanderbilt you were on a management
consulting correct youth like you got
you know you got above harvard's mid
score for your you could have had an
incredible career of course right right

30
00:29:00.000 --> 00:30:00.000
gym owner doesn't sell well in cocktail
parties right right what are you would
you uh you know he's uh he's figuring
himself out yeah he's doing this little
gym as a side thing yeah we'll snap out
right and so
you know i mean i made plenty of
mistakes too when i had the gym so it
wasn't like all you know sunshine and
rainbows for me like i had a lot of
mess-ups that i did i got in bad
partnerships i mean like all the things
that you could possibly do and over that
five-year period
of me scaling to six locations with my
with my facilities at the end of that
whole thing i ended up losing it all
really yeah lost everything six
locations lost the whole business well i
sold it i sold five of them i shut one
of them down um because i wanted to
start doing this gym launch thing which
would be like flying around doing
turnarounds because i started that's
when i met layla um but you find a gym
that's kind of like not succeeding in
trying to fly in yeah when you do a
makeover yeah exactly bar rescue scene
right like same exact thing she's on a
tv show with it
believe me
the many regrets i have right that would
have been an awesome one we did 32
turnarounds wow it was almost two years
yeah and so um we we we started doing

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00:30:00.000 --> 00:31:00.000
that anyways i lost everything um
because i took all the sale money and i
put it into my last location and then
the partner that i had there siphon the
money out
because i was like yeah like well i'll
put all the money from the sale of these
gems into this thing like it doesn't
matter um it was my own mistake it was
on me um
but it was even then it was you know
we'll see you know we'll see how like
this isn't real like we'll see and then
once i started
once gym launch really started taking
off it wasn't until i think we did like
17 million in ebitda like profit take
home um in one year in one year
that my dad i was 27. that's crazy
my dad my dad called me and he's like
are you sitting down i remember like at
this point like we were like not talking
too much you know maybe every few months
it'd be like a five minute phone call
and so i was like
sure yeah i got time what's up and he's
like you're going to want to hear this
and i was like okay what he was like i'm
sorry
and it was first time you'd ever
apologize to me in my life and what's

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00:31:00.000 --> 00:32:00.000
interesting to me though is that it
didn't feel like anything i didn't care
why not
because i had stopped caring about what
he thought about me a long time ago
and it was like when i quit my job was
the day that like i i accepted dying to
my father because because very much to
me at that point was i was i was really
really sad at that point in my life when
i had the job because i had really done
everything that he had wanted me i
finished vanderbilt in three years
as president of fraternity uh i had won
writing awards i'd done like a bunch
like i'd done everything you know i was
in i was vice president of the
powerlifting team like yeah every club
all the stuff i could possibly finish
yet while still being president and did
it in three years right and got a
management consulting job that was like
a good job
had all the credibility and it just i
knew it wasn't enough and i knew that
and so i knew that the choice for me was
that i either had to die to him or i had
to die to myself wow and that was
ultimately like the choice that that i
put in front of myself and that was
whenever i was like
maybe i should just get i was like die
to him or daddy you and so that was what

33
00:32:00.000 --> 00:33:00.000
gave me the the
the confidence to to break that and then
i physically moved because i couldn't be
in the same area wow so i actually went
23 at this point yeah
so i called my dad when i was like in
ohio and i'm from baltimore so i'm like
it was for you i called him when i was
there and i was like hey by the way i'm
doing the gym thing
he was like okay he's like why don't you
come over we'll talk about it because he
knew because he knew that like if he
came over with enough battering i would
be like fine i know this is a smart
thing i'll take the g you know i'll
apply to you know booth and harvard
whatever and i'll get the i'll do that
whole thing
and that because that was a cycle i just
kept doing that and i was just like no
i'm not going to do it so i was like
well i can't i'm in ohio he was like
what do you mean
and then the tone totally shifted and he
was like you always do these crazy
things you're always like he's like
you're never balanced it's always
extreme with you there's no middle path
and so anyways i you know i did that
five years gyms lost it all anyways and
then started
and it started jim launch and then
that's one and then that really took off

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00:33:00.000 --> 00:34:00.000
sure and then um but when he called me
and he apologized um and this is where i
like you know i'm ashamed of myself but
like i could have just let it lie and
been like thanks appreciate it you know
what'd you do instead um
instead i said i was like you know when
people get up on stage and they're like
hey you know they get awards and they're
like hey mom and dad i just want to say
thanks so much for always believing me i
was like i won't say that oh my gosh i
was like because you never did i was
like the only time you accepted me i was
like is once every other person on this
planet had accepted it too oh my gosh
man and so
that's so i said that's intense on the
phone he said that yeah what do you say
to that he said well we'll see how long
it lasts oh my gosh so that was he was
still kind of in competition with yeah
and to be fair when he apologized he
said you know i'm sorry he said but in
my defense if it had been in my time i
would have been right
and so you know um but all that to say
like i should have just said like
appreciate the apology you know thank
you because
you know
tony robbins said something that i
thought was really impactful was like
for the vast majority of my life it's

35
00:34:00.000 --> 00:35:00.000
been like
how my father shaped me or whatever
but rather than thinking like
what what can i use from this dynamic
like what gift do i have yeah like from
his mother
kind of like beating him or whatever
yeah exactly like what do i like what do
i you know they're blaming for the good
right and so like i have so many things
to blame for good from that and i'm very
very happy with my life that is why 20
000 a month didn't feel significant to
me because the goal that i had my
expectations
weren't to make money my expectation was
that i had to make more than he had ever
made and so i had a very big vacuum to
drive towards which i think in a lot of
ways was a gift because like i blew past
a hundred thousand five hundred thousand
a month million a month like i blew past
those things because like it was never
about having enough money for me
it was about
feeding this monster
but once i got there
i realized that what i had done was set
up a game
to win by my father's rules
and so then i and you could never win
right and to be fair would i want to win

36
00:35:00.000 --> 00:36:00.000
a game that i was wasn't for me
it was making you suffer sure you're
playing the wrong game i'm playing his
game yeah and so i did win but i wanted
his game not much right right and so
that was kind of what i think making
that realization was it was kind of the
slow shift that happened from there so
when you won the financial game or the
game of like i've made more than you in
a month or a year then you made your
whole lifetime
how did that make you feel and when did
you realize you needed to start playing
a different game and what would that
game become okay there's three questions
there what was the first one how did it
make you feel the moment you crossed the
finish line of the game of making so
much more than he'd ever made
in a short amount of time relief because
we actually got our relationship back
um not like you know i wouldn't say we
have like sunshine and rainbow but like
we have a functioning relationship um i
would say it's role-based like i'm a
[ __ ] you know yes but what happened was
we are both very like strong
personalities
and it wasn't until
i think that he accepted me as off in
our relationship that we were able to
kind of like move forward again because
before that my because my my dad's uh

37
00:36:00.000 --> 00:37:00.000
he's a doctor so he's always had you
know like decent money and i wanted to
be beholden to no one you know excluding
including him like i didn't want his
money right i didn't want anything you
know right and so i think i had to
establish my own i'd like really plant
my own flag to be
seen as a man in his eyes and so i think
once that happened i think i thought
there was some level of like there's no
conflict here anymore like this is
undeniable
yeah this is beyond reproach yes i have
a
attractive wife who's really nice and
awesome i have a business myself i'm in
good shape and if you think about it
like the way i mean i'm just being
really real with you i blame my father
for the many things that that i have
become in a lot of ways right because
everything that was not perfect was
criticized right and so like i've had a
six-pack since i was 15. wow and it was
because he used to always criticize
everyone who was overweight and being
that they're undisciplined and they
don't they don't try hard right and then
i've you know like and then it was like
about having pretty good nice everything
perfect women right yes not just pretty

38
00:37:00.000 --> 00:38:00.000
but like everything has to be perfect
right and then and then making lots and
lots of money and so it's like all of
these elements i had to max out
to again win at that game and but my
whole life was designed to be
bulletproof was that so that i just
wouldn't be criticized and so that was
because that was what i just i knew that
if i could criticize myself harder than
anyone could then if they did say
anything it was never as mean as what i
would say to me what's the meanest thing
you say to yourself oh like
it's all around just not being good
enough right now i mean oh not now not
now but i was like
and it was it was about being to be fair
that the actual thing would just be
being weak
ensued is all about strength mentally
emotionally physically
financially everything just weak
that's how you felt yes you felt
powerless for you most your 20 teens and
20s
for sure
and so everything that i did was to
counteract that right like what can i do
as big and strong as i can get yeah yeah
i'm going to make as much money as
possible i'll have all the women i

39
00:38:00.000 --> 00:39:00.000
didn't get yeah exactly 100 and that was
and so i pushed against that to try and
to quell that you know that that need or
that desire that feeling did it satiate
that need when you had all those things
yes and no
yes because when i got there it forced
me to change my perspective the
perspective is what changed the way i
felt basically realizing that those
things were never going to solve
anything is what allowed me to but and
les brown i think says this where he
says like
everyone knows that money doesn't
money doesn't make happening but
everyone's like i'll see for myself
yeah and so i think it was one of those
like i had to cross all the like
and i'd say this not as a as a slight to
anyone else but like i had to check off
the easy ones from the list which is
like from getting in shape getting the
good wife getting the money in the
business all that stuff like those are
circumstantial that means i can push
with enough effort i can change my
conditions i can change my surroundings
in my environment and if i can change
those things will they make me feel
better and so i think once i knew beyond
a shadow of a doubt that that couldn't
that didn't work right um maybe they

40
00:39:00.000 --> 00:40:00.000
helped me maybe they helped in some ways
but not the internal
ways so what did you have to shift your
perspective or what was that shift yeah
where you could still have it all
and then have it all internally as well
i think that the whole ego death concept
that we were talking about the very
beginning i try not to talk about this
too much because i think it's it's um a
lot of people find take offense to it
and i don't mean it that way i sure this
is just what worked for me and not as a
criticism of any anyone else's beliefs
for me the idea that there was no such
thing as legacy that when i died
eventually everything that i had would
become dust
and that anything expanded over a long
enough time horizon disappears right
which if you are like christian for
example it's the whole book of
ecclesiastes um
if you
and i think the realization of that
allowed me to quiet my ego
a lot
so that i could be more present in the
idea that like this moment will only be
here in my mind and anything that i do

41
00:40:00.000 --> 00:41:00.000
here will not last
and so
it shifted how i worked it shifted how i
saw relationships and a lot of my
thinking is around like my 85 year old
self i feel like my number one mentor is
like my fictitious 85 year old self
because it's the only person that i
really believe has my best interest at
heart and it's no ulterior motive
and so there's this there's this tweet
that i had that went pretty viral but it
was like
listening to a billionaire or a
millionaire i'll just use that like when
i was in my 20s i wanted to be a
millionaire and when i was a millionaire
i wanted to be in my 20s
and so
the idea that my future self would trade
all the money he had to be poor and 20
again
made me really reanalyze how i saw
living life in the moment if i literally
in the future will value my present
moment more than the achievement of the
thing that i'm i'm seeking right now in
the present
then something's something's off because
even my future self knows that because
right now i would pay all the money i

42
00:41:00.000 --> 00:42:00.000
have to get 10 years back
because nobody was thinking about it and
so then
all of what i'm going to achieve in the
next 10 years i would happily give up to
be right where i am right now
and so i think thinking about that
really shifted a lot for me because it
helped me
quiet i'm not saying eliminate but quiet
some of the thoughts that are more ego
driven
because the ego always wants to like
separate and isolate from others and
prove that it's better
and if i know that it will all be dust
there is no better because we're all
going to be dust and so in that same way
if like if we're all going to be dust
destined we're all siblings
like two very strong frames for me at
least
it helped me quiet that aspect and i
think in that way i was able i think
asking like people but like i think i
was able to show up better as a leader i
was better able to show up better as a
husband um show up better like to make
content things like that like i don't
think i could have made the stuff we
make now
five years ago because i still think it
would have been more it would have been
to proving something yes it was

43
00:42:00.000 --> 00:43:00.000
perfect numbers proving 100 percent of
improving proving someone
proving a fictitious foe wrong
right right they're all talking about
right right no one cares about you
exactly and so that was really it's like
i had to shift from like no one cares
about you two
like
i really want to have a shirt that says
no lives matter but i feel like it would
give away
no like no one cares about you yeah yeah
but i feel but i think there's like a
lot of like meat to that where it's like
if we can because in that way we are all
equal and so us i think it's almost the
most egalitarian perspective is that
like in the end we will all be dust yeah
and so i think in that way that's like
we have these exchanges that we have um
and in some ways it makes it more
beautiful
why do you think so many people care
about power and respect
so much it usually was withheld from
them i think i think the things that we
are that were withheld from us are the
things that usually we seek the most
i think how many how many really
successful guys have daddy issues you
don't mean
so many yeah and so it's like okay well

44
00:43:00.000 --> 00:44:00.000
i didn't get his respect so i'm gonna
have to compensate with my circumstances
with my environment so that everyone
respects me and some people do that
through fear some people do that for
violence some people do that through
success it really just depends what
vehicle you choose but like the i feel
like the deep need is the same yeah
there's something like i can't remember
the statistic but the a number of
u.s presidents
a big number of them like grew up
without a father or their father died
early in their life
and there was i can't remember the
status like 30 or 40 or something of
like the us presidents
lost their father or didn't have a
father or something like that early on
and it's like well you know now they're
going to go prove something or go to be
something you know to
what about the
the habits that you learned of
the wealthy people once you started to
really earn and scale your wealth were
you studying wealth or were you just
fixated on like how do i get one more
customer and increase my prices make
better product
what did you learn about the habits of

45
00:44:00.000 --> 00:45:00.000
the rich
i haven't learned much about the habits
of the rich at all to be very candid
with you i think that maybe there are
some beliefs that because like my dad
was a doctor i wouldn't say he was like
you know ultra wealthy but like we lived
in upper middle class you know lifestyle
but
in terms of like wealth as i think you
and i would probably understand it i
didn't know anything about that and i
don't think i've ever really studied it
very much i would say that my heroes now
like i started studying wealth after i
became wealthy
so like what did you learn about it
afterwards and what do wealthy people do
that you think poor people don't do they
pick higher leverage opportunities in a
sentence so like poor rich dad poor dad
like poor dad says get a job
poor dad says get a higher paying job
like rich dad says like and the thing is
there's so many innate beliefs that seem
commonplace it's like well of course you
don't mean like well of course you know
and you know you buy some real estate
and you know it'll appreciate over time
before you invest in some stocks like
yeah of course
but like
poor dads just don't say that and so you
have to like learn that i think and i
didn't so i'm grateful in that i didn't
have to learn that because i heard that

46
00:45:00.000 --> 00:46:00.000
just was of course yeah once you have
some money like of course you don't
spend your whole income of course you
don't and so there's a lot of of course
you don't that i think i i inherited
just by being like a saving father but
there's also some upper middle-class
people who don't save anything so like
right but i think my dad did a lot of i
think he helped a lot with like money
hygiene
i've had a lot of really good money
hygiene from my dad
the big the big breakthrough that i had
for me was when i stopped focusing on
and this is going to sound backwards but
when i started my gyms i was all about
building the business right and
when i built the biggest companies that
i've had and now recently sold and now
we have our portfolio it was about how
do we make the most money
and i know that sounds completely
backwards but the only way that you can
make the most money
is to provide an exceptional
valued service and charge a ton of money
for it and because i optimized around
making money i started going through for
low capital expense businesses because i
had lost everything after that five-year
stint and so i was like never again am i

47
00:46:00.000 --> 00:47:00.000
going to reinvest every dollar from the
business back into the business because
i've lost it before so when i started
the next business and every business
i've had thereafter like we take
dividends every month and we do that
because you don't wait till there's an
exit 10 years later i mean put all your
money in i'd love to do both yeah yeah
why not both sure right and so that
would take a dividend and get a bigger
course yeah but not just put money in
and wait and get no money back 100 and
the thing is is and this was a fallacy i
had because people always talk about
like reinvesting in their business but i
realized that that just meant that they
weren't making profit and so
and so the vast majority of businesses
even the software world is somewhat
shifting in this um
but they want to see profit and then
even better is if you have net free cash
flow which is just a fancy word for the
amount of money that you can take out
every month after
making necessary investments in the
business and so i wanted to have
businesses that pumped cash flow uh
because i lost it all before and so i
think there's a lot of like every every
one of my business seasons i've i would
say i've had three
business seasons i had my gym ownership

48
00:47:00.000 --> 00:48:00.000
period i had my
turnaround and early gym launch day
period and then i had prestigious labs
the licensing business in allen that was
like my last season where you exited
yeah
yeah and then i'd say like now we're in
we're in our this their third season i
guess so
brick and mortar gyms licensing
supplements and software and then you
know third season is what we have now
and each of those
has a huge huge magnitude of leverage
that was added to it
and so you know this like gym launcher
started on accident in that i was like
this might be a way that i could make
money because people were like hey
you're doing this pretty well for your
own jibs can you help me determine what
it was yeah like can you teach me what
you've done
it was exactly all right let me go in
here and oh i just helped them double
their revenue in 60 days yeah maybe i'm
good at this i'll go people pay me more
for that then they'll pay me to help
them lose 20 pounds right and so that
was the big that was when i went from b
to b to c to b to b yes um and then from
there to be honest it was just going up
another another order of magnitude
because now instead of just building the
one business now we're building lots of

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businesses at the same time and so
that's kind of like why acquisition.com
i think has a much higher you know his
his bigger feet for lack of sure right
and so what do you look for when you're
you're acquiring a business or investing
in a business that has cash flow and
what businesses have the best cash flow
so this will be relevant for everybody
in the audience and also hits on what we
were talking about with the wealth thing
like wealthy people choose higher
leverage opportunities and we went over
what leverage was earlier um the best
businesses especially in an inflationary
period are businesses that have low
capital expenses okay um and that's
because if you have some examples yeah
so i'll give you opposite examples to
make and then i'll drive it so the
something that does have high capital
expense which is what you would not want
to get into would be like stuff that has
lots of inventory stuff that has lots of
supply chain lots of manufacturing heavy
equipment things where you have to
constantly buy more stuff in order to
increase capacity right
a low capital expense businesses are
things like services right services uh
you know digital businesses
software is mixed because sometimes the

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development team can be considered a
capital expense it really depends on how
you build the dev team but the idea is
that if you can
produce 10 times more units without
phenomenally changing the
the cost basis then you will have a
business that has lower capital yes and
so that's what you like and most of
those types of businesses produce more
cash flow have more pricing power and so
i mean that's what warren buffett
invests in right it's high you know like
um
insurance geico right there's no capital
it's risk they're literally assessing
risk error it's math like the business
is math like if you really think it's
just math is the entire business of
insurance and what's crazy just a side
note is that a great way of figuring out
the highest leverage businesses that
exist is looking the business has been
here the longest
insurance has been here since before
world the world wars right thank you the
banks have been around forever right jp
morgan was in 1800s wow right the the
biggest insurance companies they're all
100 plus years old they're found in the

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1800s and so when you have a business
that's lasted that long to me that's a
great breadcrumb of like this thing has
to print money because it means that
they were able to still keep making
money through wars through families
depressions all of it and they were
still able to keep going and so i think
that when people are like when you look
at all the like many of the biggest
businesses that exist they have
phenomenal gross margins i don't want to
get too like
you know business terms here but like
the the gross margin is how much
incremental cost it is to make a new
an extra widget right and so like a pill
for example costs 100 million dollars to
make the first pill and then every pill
after that costs a penny right sure and
so the gross margin on the pill is very
high because if they sell each pill for
10 they cost them a penny those are
great margins and most people who are
small business owners or people who are
trying to get into small business price
like small business owners they say well
it cost me a dollar i'll sell it for
three or i'll sell it for two but if
you're already starting on like a fifty
percent gross margin it's very very hard
to make money because think about like
that's at 100 you're already at half and

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then you have the rest of everyone else
you have to pay off that extra 50. very
hard to do and so like i'll give a
couple rules of thumb if anyone wants
this but like if you're if you're
building a service-based business for us
i would i
by all means i have to get gross margins
above 80 which means five times the cost
of goods so if it cost me 100 a month
the minimum i'll charge is 500
right and so that also gets you to think
about business differently which is
not necessarily even how much can i
charge but how can i provide value and
make it cost this little to me how can i
be as efficient as possible and if you
think about what technology does over
time is technology takes something
that's valuable and makes the cost of
delivering it less
and so that's what happens is a lot of
people are able to have access to things
that were once only for the wealthy but
now become for the common man because
the cost basis decreases as a result of
technology and so technology is we see
it you know like we can create
technology but you can also have
technological um breakthroughs just
through process in your own business
it's like and that's where niching down
and being very specific about the avatar

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becomes important especially when you're
starting because then you can productize
the service because if you're doing
everything custom which most people when
they're starting out do
it becomes really difficult to become
efficient and it's really difficult
because a very little margin right or
you have to charge huge fees which most
people are too afraid to do and so the
flip side is if i do the same thing over
and over and over again i will get
better and more efficient at it and i'll
know how to do it faster and quicker and
cheaper and i specifically choose this
type of customer so that i can have more
margin because
there are millions of even this one
specific type of avatar
and then from there i can take the gross
margin the extra cash that i have and i
can hire the best people i can invest in
marketing but when you have such little
margin to work off of it's very
difficult to make money yeah it's so
hard to grow that's interesting what do
you think it's going to be harder or
easier to become wealthy and start
businesses over the next few years
with everything that's happened in the
last couple years and where this whole
great you know
2030 agenda is coming and all these
different things are happening the war
and all the you know there might be
another pandemic whatever it might be do
you think it's gonna be easier or harder

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to make money i think technology in
general makes things easier for most
people i mean because at the end of the
day it's just it's it's increased access
for more people yeah and so i think to
reach more people yeah at any moment
yeah if i were just to use history as a
as a as a guide business has only gotten
easier to get into it's got
more competitive and easier to get into
and so i think that what happens is just
the arena gets bigger so you got more
gladiators so it's more competitive but
more people can walk in and so i think
but it but for the world in general
the more people you have fighting to
make
amazing products and services the better
it is for society yeah but the
downstream effect of that is that in a
capitalist system it is a winner take
all for most for for many not all but
for many businesses and just by the
nature of it that does create social
disarray and it's just but the thing is
is like it's still the best system that
we have we don't have a perfect system
because the other systems remove
incentive and humans have driven by
incentive yeah even the survivorship
bias like every mlm in the world exists

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off the fact that there's that one guy
who makes 500 000 a month selling shake
mix and the other five million shake
mixed producers are like someday one
yeah
yeah and it's just survivorship bias
right but that's why the whole
capitalist machine works so i think
they're like figuring out some sort of a
you know
creative way like my i
put this in my
on my youtube channel um but like the
idea of having 100 death tax
i thought was like
take down like the income taxes and all
the stuff but like the thing that
creates the conglomerate at the top is
that
if let's say let's say i have a hundred
billion dollars right that's interesting
and if 500 billion i'm probably pretty
good at managing it because that's why i
have a hundred billion so let's say you
gave me 15 years holding it yeah you're
not using it yeah let's say i gained 15
on my assets so make 15 billion dollars
right on my assets
it is so hard for anyone to
to make that up in a lifetime with just
the one and like that might be my kid
who gains 15 and the next year he gains
20 like and so it the compounding effect

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of the wealth is across generational is
where i think it gets crazy but if there
were a hundred percent death tax because
obviously this is aligned with my belief
that all of it disappears anyways um so
this is obviously alex's two cents in
the world um but it's just basically
dramatically lower the income income
taxes i think income taxes should be
like as close to zero as possible and
then make the capital gains taxes higher
because that's only going to really
affect the well if you really want to
think about it right because people who
if you make with your hands
awesome right if you make on your assets
that's the stuff that has has infinite
leverage with with time so if you trade
the most expensive thing for your money
then i feel like you should get taxed
less than if you trade no time for your
money sure this is like a weird thought
experiment what do you think would
happen if it was 100 death tax
i think that billionaires would become
far more giving
and as they approach the end they know
they can't keep it and i also think it
would change the way the game is played
because if you know because this is the
analogy that i like
i haven't heard it anywhere else i think
it's mine
but if you were to imagine life as a

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poker game right and we everybody you
know grows up 18 years old they can go
into the casino they get a chip or 21
whatever age you can pay and then you
get it you get a chip and then you sit
down at the table and you're dealt cards
right there's all the other players
around the table and depending on the
cards you're dealt and the skill you
have
you begin to amass chips right
and the difference between this
fictitious
you know casino and the casino of life
is that in the real world you can amass
chips you cash out you have a big wad of
money you walk out the door
but in the casino of life when the grim
reaper taps you and tells you it tells
you it's time
you have to get out from the table but
your chips stay on the table and they
push them to the middle to be
distributed by everybody else and
continue to get played for it and that's
when you realize that it was a fake game
with rules that never mattered to begin
with and so i bought this piece of land
in austin it was just huge it was like a
big really really nice lot and i
remember thinking to myself like
this yeah i got me some land right
yeah i have that tree to that thing on
the rise
right
and then i thought to myself i was like

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well the guy before me thought the same
thing
and the guy before him thought the same
thing and the guy before him thought the
same thing and i was like and we've
literally still been looking at the
exact same piece of dirt and it's just
been cycled even if it was father to son
even if it was family to whatever like
that like death taxes everyone 100
like
even if the government doesn't death
taxes everybody 100 and then time taxes
your money to infinity because like
people are like i want to build a legacy
it's like that's even just with like
within americana you know within the
times of america but like you go a
thousand years and there's never been
the same superpower over a thousand year
period right and so we're like i'm gonna
leave a legacy it's like but that would
be like you know let's say an ancient
greek saying i'm going to leave a legacy
for my kids when like they might change
their currency by you know xyz year and
there's so many things and i've had a
real experience with this because my
great great grandfather was a ruler in
iran which is where we're from
we got uh kicked out because we were
loyal to the shah back in the day
which is why my dad came to us

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and so despite that my great grand great
grandfather um had like 400 wives
ruler very very really yeah very very
wealthy different time different
different culture very very well he's a
ruler right yeah yeah all the money all
the women all that everything literally
a ruler right
and
it doesn't matter and here i am i'm not
even that many generations separated
from him right even that you don't have
all that wealth you don't have that land
yeah right
and so like the idea that we're going to
somehow esc
because the desire for legacy is the
desire to cheat death like that's what
it stems from it's like we don't want to
die we want to last forever so we want
to make something that is impermanent
and so we fool ourselves into thinking
that the accolades and the material
success in the books we write whatever
are going to last forever and they're
probably not right and so like i mean
the sun's going to disappear at some
point right like if we don't do anything
before then like at the very least
that's going to happen and so if that is
the inevitable outcome i think it shifts
the way people
think and i think that's when you start
changing i mean tony robbins talks about

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like global global belief systems and
that's why if someone like adopts a new
religious belief like everything changes
because the reasons they do and the way
they believe the world works changes and
so i think that if they did do 100 death
tax it would be a really interesting way
to see the downstream effects of how it
would change the way the players played
the game what do you think would happen
if all the billionaires started
distributing their wealth sooner
i think or would they be as hungry to be
and driven to push and build and
innovate yes to generate the wealth if
they knew i got to give this away
anyways quickly i think they would well
i think it's because it's i think it's i
think i'm going to say something that
might sound bad but
um
i think winners win
because of who they are
and so i think it's like sales guys like
you can have an incentive or a comp plan
they just want to win but they are sales
people and if i get on the phone
i want to sell because of who i am not
because the comp the cop has the ticket
to get me to say yes to the deal but it
will not change my activity i will do it
because i love to sell right and so i
think billionaires get there because
they love the game like you don't get to

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01:00:00.000 --> 01:01:00.000
a billion without just because you
obviously don't need it for you you stop
needing it for you millions and millions
ago right and so you do it just because
you love the game
what i do think the reason that i like
that solution is because
uh elon musk said this but uh private
enterprise is ten times as efficient a
capital allocation compared to the
government right so every dollar that
private private enterprise spends it's
ten times more efficient and so
it is like if if we were to death tax a
hundred percent so whatever you
accumulate while you're alive it just
goes back like and the thing is it's not
that it would go back into the system
through the government it would if you
were lazy
but most people knowing the government
was going to take it the less efficient
vehicle at the end of your life you
would then start thinking about how can
i allocate this money efficiently
and so what i think what would happen is
you'd create far more ingenuity and
innovation around social enterprise
um before they die solving problems
knowing that the wealth would eventually
disappear
so like it's more there's this backstop
that no one wants to hit and so i think
what happened is they would change their
behavior before hitting the back side i
don't think a lot of people just be
dumping their billion to the government

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i think just knowing that they had to
would then just trigger them to yeah
yeah that would be you know that's
alex's two cents of the world which is
obviously different what's uh and you
just had a big exit right last year what
was that for how much
it was 46.46 million so when that enters
your account
what did you expect would happen what
did happen and what
can you teach other people about what
they should expect to happen when they
have a big exit
so i will say that i i did not feel the
money i did feel the loss of cash flow
because i had this you know i had
measured myself off cash flow for since
now you don't have any right you got a
big chunk yeah no money coming in every
month so i actually felt interested and
i probably still still feel
poorer
now than i did before the exit that's
interesting because the cash flow is
going down now i
i know that the acquisition.com is going
to be i think significantly bigger than
sure than those companies were um but in
the interim i definitely did not feel

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01:02:00.000 --> 01:03:00.000
any better after that um i am happy that
i did it because i do think i'm in the
right you know vehicle doing what we're
doing now making the books making the
youtube channels the the twitters
the social medias all of them but
the cash flow is what i felt
and because i'd taken dividends my whole
life the amount of money that we got out
was pretty much about what we already
had anyways right so it was not
life-changing in any way um it didn't
change how i lived at all
um like not at all we didn't we didn't
have any big like what are you gonna buy
i was like well i could you know i'm
happy already yeah i could buy a hundred
lambos before the sale yeah i mean like
that wasn't good and i never bought them
in and i never did so like you know
because i i don't get a lot of out of
that um what else was different losing
losing the team is hard yeah um because
when you sell a company you sell the you
sell the people like that's something
that people connections because it
sounds bad yeah but you sell you sell
the organism you sell the system the
people yeah the process
and everything 100 and so that was that
was hard because there's definitely
times now that we're building

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01:03:00.000 --> 01:04:00.000
acquisitions.com where i'm like man i
wish i had so-and-so oh
i already taught this person everything
i'd like to have to do it again so yeah
there is a but there's also some level
of beauty to it because now that i'm
doing acquisition.com
um i have a different appreciation for
what i'm doing because every other time
that i've started something
it has been from a place of lack it has
been from uh like well this is what's
going to not make me bore you know what
i mean like the gyms was all about that
and then i lost it all so the second
time was all about that again wow so
this time i'm starting not like that and
i know what it got like before we sold
the companies last year i spent
basically 12 months not doing anything
because i wasn't required in the
business like it truly it ran
and so
i had a lot like it was very impressive
exactly it was very depressing for me
what happens if we don't have a purpose
i mean you you find one
yeah you know what i mean and so for me
but you're in a depressed state even
though you have i mean i'm sure you're
fine but you're emotionally mentally

65
01:04:00.000 --> 01:05:00.000
like what am i doing every day exactly
i've never go to the gym for so long
right can i go out to dinner yeah like
what else are you gonna eat every meal i
want i can travel okay now what after
three months of that
you to have some mission you have some
purpose right even though you have the
money yeah your safety you have
everything yeah security but it wasn't
fulfilling 100
and so that was that was 12 straight
months and it was because we were going
through a sales process so
you can't start new initiatives because
i'm in the middle of a sale
um and you don't want to like make any
massive new hires
and so you just basically have to just
like maintain
and the whole time you're wondering i
hope this deal goes through because if
it doesn't then you just wasted a year
just doing nothing and then you might
have to do it again so it was just it
was it was a super
super it was one of the most emotionally
tiring years of my life because it's
always like this is about to happen it's
not going to happen the deal's on the
table the deal's off the tape like
there's all of this drama that's
happening constantly and i also one of
the things that sucked that i didn't
like was

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01:05:00.000 --> 01:06:00.000
as soon as i had made the decision to
sell
or that i was going to entertain the
idea of selling
and this is a mistake i made
everything became about satisfying a
fictitious overlord of like what will
they think about this move well how
would they value this and i started
thinking
whatever acquirer
who whatever private equity was going to
buy the company like how are they going
to see this are they going to value this
or is this a waste and so what happened
was i started making the private equity
buyer my customer
and that was a mistake and so i think
that like
at the end of the day and now that and
what happened was interestingly we
started the sales process because my
wife and i were beat down like we were
just very tired of you know we've been
in gyms for almost 10 years you know at
that point not to say that
that's not a good thing but like
whatever we it we wanted of course we're
ready we're ready but in order for us to
sell it and make it a sellable business
we had to fix all the things that we
were wrong
right and so we took a year before the
year
so it's like 20 20 years exactly yeah so
it took two years basically one year to

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01:06:00.000 --> 01:07:00.000
like fix everything and then one year to
sell it but the thing is it's just like
when you have a house that you like fix
up before you get ready to sell it by
the time your budget's up you're like i
love this this is amazing i just fixed
all these all the problems i fixed now
i've got more cash flow it's more
efficient you know we've got where's the
tax going exactly
and so it was again a very like mind
trip experience where i'm like well
maybe i should just hold it as an asset
that just produces cash flow yeah
uncle warren never sells anything like
selling is what makes you rich keeping
is what makes you wealthy like you know
i'm like i've got all these kind of
things in the back of my mind but i
think ultimately like i think no matter
what we had done we would have been fine
but i think for me right now i think the
likelihood that the choice if i had two
alternate realities which i don't have
to play in i think that the choice will
ultimately yield more impact for more
people
i would not have the attention to do
acquisition.com and the media stuff that
we're doing right now i wouldn't be here
just straight i wouldn't be focused on
your gyms yeah or the yeah exactly on
those companies that weren't in that
portfolio and acquisition.com would
still be a side thing but it probably
wouldn't be the main thing
um whereas now it is 100 of my attention

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and the companies are killing it and um
i feel
renewed you mentioned you'd always
created something from a lack yeah but
now it sounds like there's a different
intention for why you're building
something what happens when people shift
their intention yeah from scarcity lack
mindset to
growth impact service whatever it might
be that you're coming from i'm so
excited for this question um so i think
the biggest thing that changes is time
horizon time horizon what is time
horizon and i think the single greatest
differentiator between
the poor and the middle class middle
class and rich rich and the truly
wealthy
is how they see time
and if you think about money as simply a
condensed unit of time right that's all
money is like you trade it for time i
mean you can trade time for money so
like it is they're almost equivalent
units and
the people who know how to master their
time the most mean that they know how to
master their money the most right and so
really if you want to master to the
original question of like how do wealthy
people come off these because they match
their time and so

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01:08:00.000 --> 01:09:00.000
time horizon is just like the
perspective from which we see what we
want to achieve
and so if i am doing if i'm building a
company from the place of like i believe
that this company should exist i believe
this problem is worth solving
and that is where you start it from
then you build it differently versus
versus i need to make money i need to
make money this week i need to make
money tomorrow because what can i go
make money with exactly and so i think
like i mean you've built this amazing
brand here
if if people were able to
not ask for 12 months and just serve
dude this is what i did when i launched
this because i literally sold another
company i didn't make that much but i
had enough for like two years to live
yeah i was living pretty frugal i wasn't
like
i never bought anything fancy it was
like you know
whatever food and travel maybe right
yeah but i was still sleeping on couches
back then you know just because i wanted
to save i want to spend it on
hotels i didn't start spending hotel
rooms until about four or five years ago
i would always find a way who do i know

70
01:09:00.000 --> 01:10:00.000
in that town and crash on anyway side
note but when i launched school of
greatness 10 years ago i remember saying
i'm gonna do this for one year because i
i wish i had access to this i wish this
was a thing that i could go listen to
yeah in the world to teach me yeah and
i'm not gonna try to make money like i'm
gonna do it for a year yeah
all in but i'm not going to try to make
money i don't want to make money i mean
if the money came great
but it wasn't my intention it was just
how can i create the best
content to serve people on the things
that i wish i would have learned in
school growing up yes the school of
greatness yeah and after one year i was
like man this thing's really starting to
take off yeah you know but it wasn't
based on how do i make as much money
totally it was how do i create something
that could really make a lasting change
yeah
and
that intention is what's made me
sustainable for 10 years
loving the process totally so when
people come from a place where i'm
hearing you say when they come from a
place of that intention of service or
because this needs to be in the world
art art exists not to do something it

71
01:10:00.000 --> 01:11:00.000
exists to exist right it's like no one
says why did you paint that it's like
because it needed to come out you needed
to have to express it exactly and so i
think that if people chose their
businesses that way i think and don't be
wrong i'm all about making money like by
all means go get your bag as much as you
can yeah by all means but i think that
what it does is it ends up freeing you
to then make your real
impact because then you can start the
whatever the next thing and hopefully
your first thing is that thing but
realistically it probably isn't and all
you have to do is look at every
entrepreneur that's really wealthy the
amount of graveyard businesses they have
in their bag right right and so like
right now if you're listening and you're
like i'm not sure if this is the perfect
business idea let me just save you the
time it's not because look at every
other person who has been ultra
successful they have 10 failed business
ideas so just like just start so you can
just start notching off the bad
businesses right
but extending the time horizon i think
only happens if you do shift the
intention through which you're building
it or you're just unbelievably
self-disciplined but i think it's easier
to just like start at it with the right
heart because

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small tangent but i think it'll be worth
it is that the reason that most people
aren't successful in my opinion is that
they sacrifice global benefit for local
benefit and that happens in all areas of
life you eat the piece of cake because
you have an acute local benefit versus
the global benefit of a six-pack that
lasts for a very long time or better
health etc right
instant gratification as opposed to
delayed gratification yes exactly and i
just i like saying global i just like
saying local versus global because it it
happens in an organization for example
sales guys don't want to put the notes
in the thing because it's a pain in the
butt to put the notes in the crm but
finance needs the notes customer service
needs the both success needs like all of
these other departments need those notes
for all the other things that we're
going to do and so it's a local cost but
for a global benefit and so
i think if people were able to delay
that immediate gratification which is
like this is the nature of success
i think it was funny man there was this
study that was done i can't remember it
it's the marshmallow test or the other
okay god i can talk about the
marshmallow test okay so fun fun one

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with that with the marshmallow test is
measuring
how long
they delay for the marshmallow
so
at what point does it not make sense if
they say you can get one because because
they like everyone simplifies the
experiment which is like if i give you a
marshmallow one now or you can get two
later right but what if two is in a year
yeah you're like i don't care i'll take
the one now right so then the next
question i would have is like
if you were to test kids and then say at
what point the global versus local
crosses would be and then track the kids
who had the longest
marshmallow waiting period because then
you could measure how long the most
successful property of life yeah really
interesting just total side note but the
three things that i think were in common
of the ultra successful were uh inflated
sense of self
as in they thought that they like they
deserved big things they want to go
after big things they believed in
themselves right
inferiority never being good enough
and impulse control
those are the three factors of the most
successful they're like when they did a
common factors analysis like these

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people think they believe that they can
achieve all this amazing stuff and then
it's just it's an amazing paradox
because at the same time they think
they're not good enough and they're
insecure about whether they they can
achieve it
and
they have impulse control
and so it's like if you have a plan
right and they just they and they stay
focused on the thing and
what i like i'd say the biggest
breakthroughs that i've had i think that
will create a lot of the wealth that we
will have in the future
is
is really a deep understanding of how
long long is and shooting with the
intention of like i'm only bringing this
up because my youtube guy said it he's
like i've never had somebody who
actually started it i was like we'll see
what we do in five years
i was like we'll measure that and he was
like
no one has literally ever said that to
me it was like as long as i see progress
i'm good because everyone wants results
in like two months yeah yeah like if
we're making if we're going this way i'm
cool i don't need to say like that's
good enough for most people if if they
could extend the time rise because like
i'll give you another hack you can know

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01:14:00.000 --> 01:15:00.000
how wealthy someone is based on the time
horizons they speak in
give an example so if someone's talking
about how they're trying to make you
know make money this today
hey let me hold 20 for today
you know how you know how poor they are
i have to say poor like you know
right if someone's talking about what
they're going to make this week or this
month
or this quarter or this year or this
decade
think about how different the people are
who are talking in those time horizons
and so i think that if we can shift the
time horizon that we think in
then we gain more leverage over our time
which we then know we will compound into
money yes because i think if you can
master the time you master the money
that's
uh you've been married for how long
or five years five years in a
relationship or six years or something
six years of relationship five years
married this is something i've been on
curious about a different decades of my
life right i'm 39 now just turned 39 in
march and

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in my 20s
i didn't think it was i was like how
is it possible to be with one human
being for the rest of your life right
yeah like there's so much adrenaline and
testosterone and just you know desire
you know i was thinking from a place of
desire not from a place of
i don't know from a spiritual foundation
let's say right more of a sexual desire
and i would study these different men
over the years
and the ones that i really respected
were the ones who had
amazing long-term relationships and who
had
healthy businesses that impacted people
in positive ways and had you know
semi-healthy families in general right
i'm curious
why did you decide to get married i
guess at 25 60. i was yeah 20 she was 23
or 24 and i was 26 or 27. okay
why decide to get married in your 20s
yeah
and how has that been
beneficial towards your inner peace your
health

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and your wealth yeah so i think getting
married um is a great hack for making
money
um
i have a lot of thoughts on this uh
first one is because at least if you're
anything like me
probably 80 of my attention went to
chasing tail and so
getting all of that attention back
automatically just makes you more money
right all your energy is spread out 100
percent you're doing that it's spread
all over the place and so that was
that's just like honestly just getting
into a relationship accomplishes that
going from a relationship to marriage
though was really surprising to me
because i was i would say fairly against
marriage for most of everything and
it's by happenstance leyland i got
married almost like as a dare and then
we're still married and it's been
awesome um
totally like we'll get into another time
but when i when we did get married it
was actually really interesting and
maybe this is just my own personal
experience but i felt this very sincere
shift of knowing
it felt secure
even the long term i'm like why do we
need a government body why do we need
someone why do we need an external party

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01:17:00.000 --> 01:18:00.000
to validate our relationship sign a
document from the government yeah but
there is some level of commitment that
comes with it that makes it more stable
and
knowing that it was like oh she's in it
with me
just knowing the barrier to exit was
significantly higher for both of us i
think increased our commitment to the
relationship
but
it gave me so much more stability for
risk taking in a lot of ways knowing
that she was there knowing she had my
back and you know i was texting a um a
buddy of mine who was
who was living the fast life yes oh
girls every other night yeah yeah and it
was like how do you know what do you how
do you think through this and i thought
about it and um i think that when you
get into the into the committed
relationship or marriage um
you trade novelty for loyalty
and for me that to me loyalty i i was
trying to define this for myself but
like
for me loyalty matters more than love or
is a form of love or the one that i

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value the most
and then as a secondary because i was
trying to define like what like whenever
someone says like what is love right
like if you actually like start trying
to peel the word back
most people just describe
activities that people who are in love
do
well it means and then they use a
laundry list of activities and so the
best definition i have
i know this is this made out there
is
of how much like measuring love
is how much are you willing to endure to
keep it
and so if you have a relationship with
someone and like and i would say love
and liking to me is the same thing
because it's really difficult to
differentiate between the two if you
have a relationship with someone and
you're not really willing to like let's
say wait 30 minutes later to go to
dinner with them probably have very
little liking in there right
if you have kids you're probably willing
to do a lot for them and so
like i'll give you an example that a
friend of mine said he was like man
he must love he's like if you have a car
that you've been working on all the time
like a lot of guys like tinker with must

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01:19:00.000 --> 01:20:00.000
love that car right muslim that that
thing's a piece of crap he must love
that thing it barely runs because of
what he's willing to put up with
and so it's kind of interesting when you
think like you can measure love by your
willingness to to
to sacrifice or endure in order to keep
it do you think we should endure a toxic
relationship though or something that's
no not
adding value equally or or putting forth
a level of effort to be fair the toxic
relationship i'll use the quotes here
because defining toxic would be another
call another
another video right
i think that there are there are moments
in relationships that are negative
but if you loved someone a lot
because you had a lot of benefit so
going the other direction right like but
if it's more toxic than it is then you
wouldn't put up with it right so then
is it worth is it worth is it worth
putting up with anyone having a negative
experience it depends on what you have
to gain
right and the more you love someone the
longer you're willing to wait for
another positive reinforcement so if i

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meet somebody and i have a negative
experience immediately i'm probably done
right right if i meet someone and i have
positive the next day positive two days
later positive a week later the next one
i might be willing to wait two weeks and
then four weeks and this is really just
becomes a question of human conditioning
rather than love not to get like i love
this stuff but um but anyway i can get
us back to marriage but uh
but marrying layla gave me a lot of the
security that i needed to make take the
big risks and knowing that she had my
back
and laila and i have very uncommon views
on marriage what's the i guess unique
views on marriage you guys have so most
people get married because they feel a
chemical attraction yes
and then they just wait right until
eventually it's been long enough and it
goes away yeah and they're like i guess
we should get married right yeah
we had the first date
we talked for four hours about business
all business
and at the end of the day i said you
should quit your job and work for me i
was like was it a date or was this a
date okay it wasn't just like a casual
encounter it was a 100 tinder date it

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01:21:00.000 --> 01:22:00.000
was bumble but it was a date bubble date
yeah
and all business all night the whole
thing we walked for four hours just
talking about business and the variant
said you've got to like quit your job
and work for me and she said no i just
made it not quite your job and date or
date me but i thought your job would
work for me and i said listen even if i
don't come with a deal like this needs
to make sense for you like this is how
much i'd pay i was just like this how
much i pay you this how much you'd make
like you should totally work for me um
and she said no but i kept working on
her and eventually three weeks later she
quit her job and she joined me and we
hung out every day after that one and we
did not have a super chemically
sexuality not at all
we just like doing the same stuff and we
both wanted the same outcome and so at
least as i see it it's like you have to
have an aligned mission of what you want
to accomplish in life
values of how you want to get there
and then ideally there's like bonus
bonus points for similar interests dude
it's so funny to say that because i say
that
you know from all the mistakes i've made

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01:22:00.000 --> 01:23:00.000
in the previous relationships that are
all my mistakes
it all comes to values vision and
lifestyle
and having shared alignment it doesn't
have to be 100 but it's like an
alignment and values vision and
lifestyle yeah
not in
you know if you have the sexual
chemistry which we do which is great but
not using that as the main value the
sexual chemicals yeah because in two
five ten years they may not be there but
if you don't have the values of vision
and lifestyle which you call values
missions
because it's all business risk mission
is that what we're trying to accomplish
value is how we're going to get there
and then interest is like what do we
want to spend exactly yeah that's so
funny yeah so that's that's what i think
and if you have those things
you
you create a relationship in my opinion
at least this has been my human
experience um it becomes very difficult
to get out of and i say that
intentionally in that like the best way
to stay married is to figure out how to
stay married
and so like well let's stack all the
chips in our favors like we like doing
the same stuff we like talking about the

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01:23:00.000 --> 01:24:00.000
same things and then i think in a very
important way if you if those three
things are aligned you will get exposed
to the same stimuli
and if you expose the same stimuli
you'll have the same adaptations
provided you have the same values
so if we get this exposure and we both
have the same values we'll both grow in
the same way where i think what happens
for many people is they're opposite
sides and they attract right and what
happens is you get on this you probably
are esther perel yeah
i just had her on a week ago
i'll just stop right now go ahead yeah
yeah well now i feel silly quote
my understanding of meeting captivity is
you've got familiarity right and and
you've got for us a variety and then
familiarity because this is how i do it
and and so in the beginning you've
everything's so new and exciting there's
all this variety right
and then you get to know each other and
it gets better and better cause you're
like oh my god this is amazing it's
amazing it's amazing but then all of a
sudden you keep going and then your
siblings and your roommates right and so
it's not like she says you know a uh a
problem to be solved but a dichotomy to

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be managed between familiarity and
variety and um one of the interesting
things um with with our relationship is
that we have so many ways to be familiar
so for us based on that like so you need
to create more variety yes how do you
guys do that because you talk about all
the same things you do the same thing
all day long how do you create variety
it's a great question
besides the multiple
businesses
all the business boards just you're not
doing the multiple people oh no we're
not doing that no no no i think would
stop
um
no but i think the the variety piece
comes in
through
deliberate
creation of room to be missed
space entities if you think about this
away for a week yes and you're gonna go
with your
friends or family and i'm not going to
be there you know how much you like
someone more when you see them after not
seeing them for a week it's so good
isn't that weird best feeling right
isn't that weird yeah so it's like we
can create that deliberately
so the longing exactly and so it's like
if we can like physically separate
ourselves in terms of when we work so we
work on separate sides of the house

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01:25:00.000 --> 01:26:00.000
uh we only come together for food so we
eat and then we go back and
uh ideally we're not on any of the same
meetings because the last thing i want
to do at the end of the day sit down and
say like how's your day just kidding i
was there the whole time right right
yeah so it's ideally so you work
together but you don't yes you work in
the same company but you're not on calls
all day long together hand in hand right
and we can accomplish and so that way
when we talk it's like two business
colleagues that are both after the same
thing that both believe in getting there
the same way and we're talking about our
unique things that are interesting for
me that she wants you might want my
perspective on and i'm like hey i'm
thinking about this hook or this message
or what do you think about this and we
can bounce on it but because we didn't
share every moment of the day it gives
us that ability to have variety
but i think esther said this so yeah but
the couples that um have that do do star
businesses together maybe misquoting two
research things anyways
couples that start business together
have
uh
a 10 divorce rate
if you start and make a dollar in a

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01:26:00.000 --> 01:27:00.000
business together wow and i think it's
like birthing a child except in order to
do a business i think it's harder than
having kids and people like you don't
know that because you don't have kids
it's true
but i do know that there's a lot of
people who have both there's more people
who have kids that have businesses who
started together
and i think that there's some magic
in that because it's like birthing an
idea but you both got to agree on what
you're going to create so you're not
leading up to biology or living up to
choice
do you guys ever fight or argue
sure
like i would i would say we don't have
what i would consider like
real fights low observer yeah yeah i
mean minor arguments but i'm sure that
like the many common miscommunications
that can happen as humans sure sure hey
you said this that
did is this what you meant
no no there's i was like if there's two
ways to take it and one way makes you
really angry the other one doesn't i
meant the other one
yeah whatever you're angry about
round up that's like just round up for
me what's the thing you love about her
the most

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01:27:00.000 --> 01:28:00.000
she's made of steel
she's um play is just unbreakable
so like i'll tell you the two moments in
in our marriage that like or we weren't
married yet but the two moments that
like defined her to me
so one was in we're probably nine months
into dating
um or maybe not i mean maybe like six
months into we're six months into dating
and i lost everything again standard
standard alex move right just lose
everything and
she had to go launch a gym and she had
to absolutely crush it and i was so
stressed out at this moment in time i
had
the six gyms
i had
a chiropractor agency a dentist agency
i had that and i had the launch business
where we're actually like flying out and
doing launches
i think i had one more thing i can't
remember what it was but those was eight
different businesses that i was owning i
made no money obviously because i had
eight businesses right
and
i was just i was
too stressed to function that was the
only way i could describe it is like i
was not present at all ever i was just
thin i just i was so spread then

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01:28:00.000 --> 01:29:00.000
she walked in the office one day i
didn't look up and she was like do you
want me to be here
and uh
and i was like you can do whatever you
want and
she was like well are you
do you want to break up and i was like
yeah that's fine really
and so
she said okay that's fine um
you know and she'd quit her job to do
this with me so it had been five months
like she'd quit every she'd build up a
personal training business that was
doing really well and she got rid of all
our clients so she could come do these
launches wow five months in
i i was like you know i can't whatever
and so she
went to hawaii to do this launch which
was going to be a really big launch and
i was betting big on this thing because
so she's still working with you but not
in a relationship with you yeah so we've
actually like work is is the thing that
was our first language it came naturally
to us
and so she went there and i had i think
i lost all the money for the seventh
reason in a row right and i had like 10
grand left and we needed to make a
hundred thousand dollars in that month

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01:29:00.000 --> 01:30:00.000
or i was going to get behind so
i it was 10 grand to get her there for
30 days in a while because hotels are
insane
and i was like you you need to crush
this even though we just broke up oh my
gosh you need to crush this
like you need to crush this that's like
all i can say
and she flew there and she said every
sales record that we had
when she got there and did a hundred and
something thousand in cash collected and
she killed it and when she came back um
i had a coach that i was like meeting
with during the the time she was gone he
was like
look at the stats of your life he's like
are you in better shape now that she's
here he's like are you making more money
now that she's here are you like and to
be fair like
in general i was still doing better
because i had started the launch
business like i was you know um
i was like yeah and he's like i think
she's a very good thing in your life and
i was like okay so anyway she came back
and she crushed it
when virtually every other person that i
know would have either not gone like
screw you i'm out of this or just wilted
under the pressure because i put a lot i

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01:30:00.000 --> 01:31:00.000
was like you need i was like this is the
last money i have like you have to crush
this and i don't care about you
intimately anymore yeah
and i don't get it
and so she killed it and then she came
back and then two or three months later
of course i lost all that money again um
and then
and so then at this point now we're
sleeping at her parents house
and you're not in a relationship no
we're so we got back together she came
back so she came back got back together
yeah i was like i was like you're
awesome like you used to talk when
everything else was crumbling like
let's keep doing this yeah and so
this leads me probably to probably the
core point of layla is that
and i i don't know if it's all
relationships but at least the way this
one is compared to every other
relationship i've had is that i
respected her first
and i don't think i had that's so key
like i don't and i say this not as any
i've loved a lot of people in the past
but i don't think i respected them to
the same degree and i think part of that
is because it was harder for me to
respect them because i didn't have a
shared arena to witness it it would be

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01:31:00.000 --> 01:32:00.000
like maybe for me i might not have been
able to respect an athlete maybe maybe
because it's just not a game i
understand as well as like a business
game sure i'm maybe just saying that i
can appreciate excellence who knows but
um i respected her and her opinion
mattered to me a lot of times i would
feel like
someone's opinion like like yeah it
matters but like
hey i'm going to do what i'm going to do
my opinion matters more her opinion i
valued equally or even higher than mine
in many occasions because i trust her
gut she's an amazing instinct with
people especially um
and so i respected her first and the
second time that happened was i'm
sleeping in her parents house
winner that i am um
he's 24 25 20. no i'm 27. yeah 26 or 27.
sleeping her brown she's 23 24
and um
they gave me like the spare kid's
bedroom so i'm like in this little desk
you know i mean like with a little chair
like crap tub and i'm like this is like
make believe except it's a real business
um
and we had this horrible day where we

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01:32:00.000 --> 01:33:00.000
lost like 150 000
and it was and i just saved like
everything was turning around everything
was turning around for us
we lived there just to like kind of save
some money yeah yeah but the first month
of getting rid of all those businesses
that i had and just focusing just on gym
launch we did a hundred thousand we did
two hundred thousand three hundred
thousand so like things were turning
around and i was like okay this is
happening and then we got 150 000
refunds which is pretty much all the
profit i made and it was because
a couple of the gyms that we had
launched basically told all the
customers to refund and then sign back
up through them for half the price oh my
god so it's like i go to a gym we pay
for everything the hotels the flights
the marketing the sales guy then let's
say we saw 100 people at 500 bucks we
make thousand dollars right just for
example
they would say hey 100 people now that
they're gone that's annoying
yeah that's messed up it was it was a
flawed model you know i mean like and i
could i could lament it but i was not
operating within the context of like
human incentive
there was a huge incentive to not be
ethical right and so
we we lost 150 000 which was all my
savings again
um

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01:33:00.000 --> 01:34:00.000
and i at that moment i had already lost
everything like three times since i'd
been with her it had been like 11 months
at this point i think at that point 10
months because we got married in maine
it was 13 months since we had met
and so i just looked at her and i'm like
in her parents you know room or whatever
and i said listen um
i'm a sinking ship and uh if you want to
get out i was like i will have absolute
respect for you we will be like we're
cool like
i will hold nothing against you because
i like i clearly am not good at this
um and that's where she was like i would
sleep with you under a bridge if it came
to that and so that was when
that was before you're married or yeah
it was before we were married and so
that was when and that like you know i
think the the dedication in that book
says uh or actually well i might be
spoiling it but then i think the next
book says you saw the light in me it's a
it's a it's a strong uh my writer died i
couldn't do this without you yeah
that's right
it's a it's a very meaningful thing but
i but i don't know if i would have done
it without her you know what i mean and

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01:34:00.000 --> 01:35:00.000
um
and so anyways all that to say she stood
tall when everything else was was
crumbling around me and for that she has
my eternal respect wow and so as a
result of that
that security knowing that she like even
when she didn't have to she was there
and she chose to be there alongside me
because she believed that we could do
this
even when i ran out of belief i think
for that that's
and that's and to be fair that was the
first 11 months of our relationship
and so like since we got married it's
been super easy yeah really easy it has
been like literally nothing was harder
than the first year of our relationship
i i want to i mean sorry
no that's great i'm assuming you want to
call yourself a marriage expert by any
means but you've been married five years
you've you've
also know you know you have a lot of
respect for
older men who've been married for a long
time you've i'm sure interviewed them
and have mentors in that space
uh what do you think
makes a strong marriage last

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01:35:00.000 --> 01:36:00.000
more respect or love
i mean
you know where i'm going with this one
um respect because i think that respect
is based on logic
love less so and so
i'll say it i'll say it differently i
think that love has a lot a strong
emotional component some days like some
days you feel like you love someone more
than other days right
but respect
doesn't change as much
because it's based on facts it's based
on evidence it's based on i the story i
just told you will not change that
happened right
and so when emotions fade logic remains
which is why i'm a big fan of logical
selling which is when someone is trying
to make a decision i do want to give
them the logical reasons for why they
should do that because when the emotions
do fade which they inevitably do about
the decision that they made what will
remain is the logic and the logic will
carry you through the dips
but if you don't have a logical reason
to be together then when the emotions
fade that's when you have no reason to
be together because the emotions are on
and there's no logic
right and so i think that for the
long-term relationship that's why the

97
01:36:00.000 --> 01:37:00.000
mission the values and the interests
there's a lot of logical reasons for us
to stay together we have a million
logical reasons together we're partners
in the business we love the same
lifestyle we're both in the fitness like
yeah and and so we have all these huge
stack of reasons
um for why we should stay together and i
think that if we can stack the reasons
and as a funny side note with the length
of marriage the average
married person spends uh two hours a day
together 45 of that is watching
television average marriage
35 24 24 minutes of that is housework
and then 35 minutes
oh
sorry uh 35 minutes is eating
and so 45 25 before so there's like 20
minutes that's not that of the two hours
that is just being with someone
and so we have spent every hour of every
day of the day together for six years
and so i feel like in that way we've had
more we've had a 50-year marriage right
from a time time perspective uh but
anyways just and and these where do you
think you'd be without

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01:37:00.000 --> 01:38:00.000
her or
a marriage like hers that has supported
you and thrived do you think it'd be as
financially successful do you think it'd
be
you'd have more time to build your
businesses or you feel like you'd have
scattered energy with
lifestyle choices
i don't know yeah i don't know if i
would have learned the lessons that
she's taught me that like if i had so if
i had a similar marriage to the one that
i have i think it would be the same if i
didn't have a similar marriage to this
one
i think i think i would have figured out
the money thing was too important to me
for me not to figure it out i think it
was just too important to me
because you had the discipline yeah yeah
and i and the fitness thing that was
alright that was always on lock and so
like the missing piece i still probably
would have had that longing to figure
out because i do because to your point
like all the people that i respect
have been in
20 or 30 or 40 or 50 year marriages and
i think there's something about
character it speaks to someone's
character when they've done something
like that and i think that was something
that i wanted to have yeah

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what do you think you're 32 now yeah
what do you think
when you hit 40 the three biggest
lessons will be that you will have
learned
or that you
if you could go into the future because
you're really good at thinking
yourself
and your 40 year old self was looking at
you right now or in a room with you
talking to you yeah and he said here are
the three things you're really going to
need to learn yeah and try not to make
these mistakes what would those three
lessons be do you think if you could go
in the future well the first one that
jumped out at me was patience works so
that would be the first i think i would
have continuous reinforcement on the
fact that the longer i wait for things
the better they are
the second one would be define your
terms
socrates says wisdom begins with a
definition of terms and so a lot of
people make these goals but they don't
know what the goal means and so they're
like i want to be healthy like what does
that mean i want to be happy what does
that mean right like we have to define
our terms before we start trying to
attack them and breaking them down which
is why like you've heard in my stuff i i
tend to define terms a lot
so i think a definition of terms is is

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have to define your terms and then third
one of lessons that um
i think would probably still be because
whenever i talk to my 85 worlds my my
therapy sessions with myself
it's always just remembering to smell
the flowers more
because
if i'm
20 years old and or 30 years old and i
would trade all the millions i have to
be 20
again then that is the lesson so
i would trade everything that i have
when i'm 40 to be 32
and so it's just like reminding myself
enjoy this now this moment yeah because
i would trade everything to be here when
i'm 40. right so like if i can just if i
can just even get a tenth of that
uh awareness in the present moment if i
can bring 10 of that future awareness to
the present moment that would be a
success for me can you break down really
how to sell someone or how to enroll
someone in your product or service
who has a reason why they don't want to
sign up
yes

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so
the the baseline assumption is this
person wants what you have and so that's
why like at the beginning of every sale
you're always asking what problem are we
solving right like why are you here what
do you want
and sometimes you have to like ask that
question a lot of different ways to get
someone actually answer it because like
if someone says well i just want to find
out more it's like they're not actually
here to find out more they're here
because they want to solve a problem so
i'm just saying what problem are you
solving it's an easier way to get to the
core of the matter and so once they
admit they have a problem then we can so
so how you approach it then i'll give
you the back of i'll give you the back
of napkin before i give you the talk
about earlier so
the back of napkin sales scripting
process that i have is called closer and
so it's an acronym it's easier to
remember so the first thing to see is
clarify why they're there all right
we've got to clarify why are you here
right what brought you in today why did
you respond to the ad why did you take
time to take this call whatever it is
right clarify we're there and keep
asking so you get the right answer if
it's just information it's like you're
not hopping on 20 calls a day taking
information all right no of course not
okay however we saw cool got that
then l is label them with a problem
right so that's where you're really
repeating back to them so let me just
get this straight so you're here because
you're trying to lose weight

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and you are struggling to do so at
current is that correct awesome okay
great then i think you're gonna like
what we have so tell me so then we go to
o so c-l-o closer oh is overview their
past experiences or past pains so it's
like well tell me what you've done so
far to try and accomplish this i'm
assuming that's not the first person
you've talked to i'm assuming this isn't
the first moment you realize you wanted
to lose weight or you wanted to xyz
right and so
then we go through what i call the pain
cycle which is like okay what did you do
you tried this and this worked for you
what was good about it what was bad
about it great what else have you done
and you go back through and each time
it's like and each time you affirm the
person you're like that must have been
hard appreciate you sharing that just
affirming and giving them positive
reinforcement throughout the
conversation and that's just building
rapport 101 right i understand how you
feel i felt the same way my sister was
like that too i totally get where you're
coming from i know that's difficult blah
blah blah right oh
s is then we saw the vacation so now
that we've exhausted all the pain
they're in the thick of the pain of
remembering all the times they fail
you're like you know what given
everything you said i think you're gonna
be perfect for what we have can i can i
tell you about it so you get permission

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to sell right and then when you sell i
like to have three main points that i
hit um and i think it's because people
remember threes very well um i know
you've seen russell stuff with webinar
like threes are remembered well
think for same thing with values in a
company i think three people remember
it's easy to triangulate ideas right
and so when we sell the points the key a
big part of this is not actually
explaining the features this is obvious
but i like giving short anecdotes that
are easy to remember so if i would say a
word like we offer accountability for
whatever program you sell right
and that doesn't mean anything to anyone
so i want to give a quick story or
anecdote to explain the concept it's
like all right well we have you know
three types of accountability we've got
peer-to-peer accountability which is
people are gonna be walking with you
shoulder to shoulder you're gonna have
uh
uh alumni accountability which people
have already finished but they're
they're just 12 weeks or 12 months ahead
of you and they're cheering you on from
the finish line and then you have expert
accountability you have people who've
helped a thousand people just like you
get to where you want to go all right so
those are the three levels of
accountability if that doesn't make any

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sense do you have a
jif did you have a kid or were you ever
a child that always gets a laugh they're
like i was kidding you're like well
remember when your parents just tell you
to brush your teeth and you want to
brush your teeth i don't want to brush
my teeth right like of course but then
every night you'd still go brush your
teeth even though you moaned about it
do you brush your teeth now you're like
yeah well that's an example of external
accountability turning into internal
habit
and so what we're going to do is we're
going to be the initial parent until you
brush your teeth but we're going to be
able to transition to getting that
internal combustion engine going by the
end of this so that you're brushing your
own teeth right right you can use the
same thing with the seat belt there's a
million examples you can use sure and so
that would be a quick whatever that was
90 second anecdote to explain point one
and the same thing for point two point
three that you have of like it's kind of
like and then you explain a little
epiphany bridge or the story of how you
realize that's important and then they
would say like that make sense yes boom
you move to the second point make sense
yes move to the third point and then
it's then you go for the closes like
well given x y and z i will tell you
this is extremely expensive and the
reason we say that is because it's even

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better than a price anchor
because extremely expensive
for everyone is expensive if i said
hey louis it's it's five hundred dollars
just kidding it's a hundred dollars you
might have thought 500 and 100 were both
cheap right but if i said it's really
expensive
whatever i say next is going to either
be actually expensive for you in which
case i braced you yeah which is actually
more likely to close the sale or it will
be less than what you perceive as
expensive and you're like oh great
because the problem that most people try
and do when they sell is they try and
minimize the thing they say next but it
actually has a counter active effect you
say it's actually not that much it's
only yeah right but when you say that
when you say only that all of a sudden
people expect low and then you rip their
expectations and so it's much better to
set expectations here but people are
afraid of doing that but that's not how
psychology works so you set expectations
sky high you anchor and then when you
say reality it either matches the braced
person or it's much lower which most
cases it is right interesting it's
really expensive does that work for

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webinar sales to mass or is that only
better with one-to-one sales calls
on webinars interesting but one-on-one
i'm curious if that also converts well i
do know that from the infomercial world
you price anchor high so it would make
sense to me that it's like i would
imagine it would still work the same way
it's like guys it's super expensive for
guys it's not five thousand dollars
right then you work your way down right
and then when we do end up saying hey
it's expensive we want to make sure that
we're selling to goal
um and the point there is that some
people sell a program but people don't
buy programs to buy results and so the
idea is we want to as closely as
possible sell the outcome that someone
desires and the same it sounds obvious
but people don't do it you know like a
lot of these like well duh but but no
one does it right
and so like in the weight loss example i
realized that people didn't want to buy
memberships no one's like i want to buy
a membership of course not they want to
lose weight and so what we did was we
shifted our selling style in the gyms
and the fitness programs to how many
pounds they needed to lose so we'd say
okay cool you need to lose 36 pounds
based on our calculations it's going to
take 36 weeks for us to get there and

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it'll take another 50 of that time
to basically re-stabilize you get your
metabolism back up and now you're eating
the same amount at a lower weight that
sounds cool great and so now it's going
to be a 52-week program it's i will tell
you it's very expensive but it's
normally you know whatever 500 a week
but instead it's only 150 a week
interesting fair enough and then when we
get into closing questions i always
prefer neutral or negative questions
because it's if i said sounds amazing
a lot of people would be like well it's
not amazing
but if i said fair enough yeah then it's
much easier to get someone say well yeah
it's fair so it's like how low can i
make the thing that they're agreeing to
and then the negative version of that
which uh chris voss talks about in the
negotiations what's the difference is no
base questions yeah right it's just like
that's not so bad is it or right or yeah
you wouldn't be opposed to moving
forward would it be totally crazy if we
move forward today would be totally
crazy we started you on monday
like all those well it's not crazy okay
cool let's do it yeah and so and then at
that point let's say lucy says no right
to whatever the thing we're selling
now we we begin the e of closer which is

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explain away their concerns so c clarify
l label o overview their past
experiences s cell which is the three
anecdotes that you're gonna tell and
then you present the price and then at
that point hopefully you they say yes
but in in the world of sales no is the
job
knows the job
they say yes then you wouldn't be
necessary right and so no like selling
is everything that you do before you
present price
closing is what you do after
and obstacles are what come up before
you present price that's when you
disagree with the prospect objections
are what happen after you present price
when they disagree with you all right
well it's all the money and all the time
i don't have let me check with my spouse
et cetera and so obstacles you want to
you want to resolve as many of those as
you can before because they become
bigger scarier monsters of objections
after you present the price
right
and so
like that example i gave earlier with
the information when someone says i just
want to find out a little bit more
information that's an obstacle like

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someone's presenting the first five
seconds they're already telling you an
obstacle like you have to confront it
and so a lot of people are like well you
know i think it's my potassium slow
right you're like
is it though
because like you know there's a lot of
people in africa and none of them have
stubborn body fat right right because
they're actually starving right but so
you would think that they have true
starvation mode but they're but they
look like they're starving so what do
you think it is you know like and then
you can get into it most people really
offended about that though but you get
it's an extreme example
so once we get to that point they say no
or i have to think about so there's
three circles and and this took me
actually a really long time to think
through
because i've gone through a zillion
different you know books and things on
sales um ironically after i already knew
how to sell not before which is just
kind of funny but different people had
different like grant had i think
decision maker stall money those are the
these like those are the three that you
always have to overcome which is like i
need to think about it i need to talk to
my spouse or it's money right that was
those are history barry from sage she
has five she has
uh time money

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uh
time money spouse fear shame
interesting i was like that's cool noted
um and then belford has his the 310s and
like there's there's a number of
different ones it's like there has to be
and they may all disagree with me on
this so who knows but there has to be a
unifying truth here right because
everybody has their own buckets and
there's obviously some elements of each
of these
and so
i pulled back from albert ellis who is
one of the fathers of cbt cognitive
behavioral therapy he said and
originally he had like 17 and then 11
and they had nine and they had seven
needed three reasons that people upset
themselves he just kept
boiling it down and the three that he
came up with are that people blame their
circumstances
they blame other people for their
unhappiness and then they blame
themselves
and so
when we are confronted with an
objection
underneath the pretense that the person
has already admitted they want the thing
that you have and the thing you have
would solve their problem so that has to
be there if we have that then we have to
walk through three concentric rings of

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power
and so the first thing that people do is
they blame their circumstances so
they're casting their power to something
else they're saying it's because of
time
the money or the money right and then
you know with the money if you were
selling a b2b thing i would say well
what's the difference between a
self-made billionaire that starts at
zero and you
it's not resources it's resourcefulness
right then you can tell a story if you
want to reinforce the point but the
other day like if you were resourceful
you can make it so the question is if
you were to die tomorrow and you needed
to come up with the amount of money for
this thing how did you do it you figured
out exactly so what we need to do is
figure out how to tap into those
resources right so the mobile you go
into that thing right and so each of
these come in your insecurities your
fears your people saying no judging you
and you just taking action and yes
risking and so underneath the
circumstances i have three big buckets
so you've got time
you've got money and you've got what i
call fit which is actually an
association with identity so usually it
might be like well i want to i use
weight loss because everybody
understands it um i want to lose
uh i don't i want to lose weight but i
don't eat broccoli your prank has

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broccoli on it like you know what i
don't like cardio though
and so that is that's where you just go
through like you got to change the
change right and there's a whole script
around yeah it's like you can't you
can't not change any of the variables
because the end of the day like you know
i used to have weight loss clients who
would say like well can we make this
this the breakfast because this is what
i already eat i'm like well that
breakfast got you that body so we got to
change something right right right gotta
change the change right and so we'd walk
through and i'm like maybe maybe you're
not heavy enough maybe this isn't enough
pain for you right and then they're like
why don't you put on 50 more pounds
right and then you'll finally make it
yeah exactly yeah and all of a sudden
they're like no no i'm like all right
well then maybe today is the day yeah
right so time money um and each of those
has three so like time is three which i
go macro micro when then uh which is
this right right yeah yeah and then you
know money
i could go through when the ticket yeah
yeah yeah i would go through too many of
them sure sure but that's circumstances
right
the next level and this is peeling back
an onion so if you're a salesperson or
you're selling someone and they blame
money or they blame time where they
blame the fit of your specific program
understand that you're actually talking

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to someone two steps away from being in
power
and so making the decision yes and so if
we believe ourselves as a sales people
to be coaches first because that's what
we're really in serving the customer the
goal of the sale is not to get the
person to buy and this is a huge thing
for most salespeople everyone has to
understand the goal is not to get the
person to buy the goal is to get them to
decide
if you get someone to decide then you
have already given them power more power
than they've ever had in a very long
time probably and i guarantee you that
you will make more money and you will
also disassociate success in selling
from purchases
you will also get more purchases
but if you do it this way then you won't
have an ego that's invested in being
right because it's not about you it's
about them right we get them to admit
that it's not it's never been about
having enough time because it's about
priorities we all have the same 24 hours
and you know what if you're really busy
now do you think you're ever going to be
busy in the future well yes i do well do
you want it to be permanent well i do
want it to be well if you're going to be
busy in the future and you're busy today
then you might as well start now when
you get the most support because you're
already busy right if you learn how to
do it when you're busy you'll know how
to do it again when you're busy in the

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future that way you'll stick with it
makes sense great time's over done right
and so each of that's one of the three
for time right
you've drilled a lot of these
and so
and so the next one is other people with
other people a lot of times it's spouse
often right and so you know i kind of
walk through a process which is
you know are they aware of the fact that
you're struggling with this
yes
do they approve of the struggle
well they don't i mean they're like well
i mean no they're not not proving of the
struggle say well then why would they be
against them they already don't approve
of right well and if the rules were
reversed would you be support in support
of them
and usually they'll say yes to that most
times like well then why would they be
against and if you're anything like my
wife i would do everything i possibly
could to support her and i think she
would do the same is that the same that
you have there with you with your
relationship yes or no cool finally i'll
walk through it's like honestly just
listen to you you know tom i think um i
think you're asking for permission when
you should be asking for support and the
reality is let's play this out right
let's play this out let's say that you
don't do this program whatever it is

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right let's play it out and
12 months from now you're more negative
situation currently more overweight more
poor whatever
and if you keep doing that
who are you going to blame
for your circle is going to be you
should be her
it's her
so is that fair to her is that fair to
your marriage no so i think what we need
to be looking for is support not
permission and so what we're going to do
then we then we tone comes up and we're
like so we're going to do is we're going
to take control we're going to take the
power you have to make the decision for
you and then she will support you and
what you have to do is when you show up
with her you're like listen i've wanted
to be an entrepreneur all my life
who knew that there wasn't an
entrepreneur school and you go through
that you know like just like doctors go
to school but no one for me and instead
of being a hundred thousand dollars it's
only ten thousand dollars and other
people and i'm not gonna moan about how
i'm not making money because i'm
actually supported with other people and
i'm committing to being more present
here to be a better wife or be a better
husband be better you know spouse to be
a better mother to our kids and you give
them the script to tell the other person
and at the very end you say at the end

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of the day sometimes like i said we have
our three day no sweat guarantee so for
some reason you go home and your husband
says listen sweetie i want you to i
don't want you to be healthy i want you
to keep the extra weight on i want you
to live 10 years shorter i want you to
pull up those sweatpants and reach your
bag into those cheetos and get them all
orange and fingery and spread it over
there and teach our kids not
generational health
and if and have you know early diabetes
if your husband says that to me by all
means
and usually at this point they're
cracking up
and that's why report matters a lot with
selling on the upfront
which the whole goal is there is to find
some some similar ground because sure if
you're in paris and you find out
somebody else is from the same city as
you you think they're amazing if you're
in the same city you don't care that all
they're from right so it's just like how
can we find some similarities because
people really are persuaded more by
people that they find similarities with
wow so the idea is how can we find those
but anyways all that to say
when you are selling
first people will confront you with time
money or fit
and you have to be prepared to know that
you might have two more

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layers you have to go through so you
might have to peel back that first layer
and then they hit you with the spouse
which is do they approve
if the role is reversed
and then uh you're asking for support
not permission right and then you go
three day notified guarantee right and
then the last level here
is self right and what people do here is
they avoid so what we're trying to
conquer is avoidance so now and here's
the good news is that when someone says
i need to think about it i'm not sure
we're talking to the decision maker
mm-hmm that's amazing yes that's
like you're the decision maker yeah this
is amazing this is great news for sales
people because they should be like oh my
god they're not giving me a money
they're not giving me time they're not
giving me spouse they're just saying
they don't need to they need to think
about it
well what's your main concern
right
tell me what you're thinking about
what are the variables that you're going
to use to make the decision
let's walk out together because the end
of the day you don't need time to make
decisions you need information i'm the
only source of information you got so
what what do you what are your questions
about
right and you keep going and then from
here all we're trying to do is
understanding the variables that they
use to make the decision and if they

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don't know them which they usually don't
we say do you know what it what it takes
to make the decision about this
and then you actually physically walk
them through confronting the decision if
they're not sure about you're like
listen i use this all the time it's
called the rocking chair clothes it's
like let's be real
you're not going to go and actually like
sit on your rocking chair on the balcony
and be like hmm am i going to do this
program of course not right you're going
to get in your car and your mom's going
to call you and got a kids and you got
the laundry and you got dinner and you
got all these other things you got to do
and then five days from now
you're gonna have some moment we either
put your pants on you check your bank
account whatever the thing is that we're
selling and you'll be like
shoot i really should have done that
thing and in that moment you have made
the decision so you might as well do it
today when you have all the information
you've got all the momentum because
you're six inches from gold right you
don't want to be the guy who because
like let's think about what we've
already done i know you want to do it
because you're already here right you
saw the ad you put in your number you
set a time you scheduled it you drove in
your car if it was here or you showed up
on zoom even when you're in the middle
of a work week you did all this stuff
and you spent an hour on the phone with
me up at this point
you're this far

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and do you think that maybe the reason
that you have that you're on this call
today is because you haven't been able
to pull the trigger in the past
and then usually they'll come up with
something like well you know what i
tried a program like this before and i
failed and i don't want to fail again
which then you go into like burn you
twice which is
well
totally makes sense and i understand
that i'm really sorry they had to go
through that well did you ever date
anybody in middle school or high school
well yeah are you married to that person
if you are they are then you can still
sit but it never yeah
they're like no i'm like imagine if you
would go on your first sixth grade
boyfriend or girlfriend
and after that you swore off men or
women after that one breakup
that'd be ridiculous right
what's the same thing here because the
thing is is if you had a bad experience
you're gonna let that person burn you
twice first time when they were with you
and now when they're preventing you from
doing the thing you really do need to do
or for preventing you from being meeting
the person you need to meet right right
and so don't give that situation more
power that already has had only let it
burn you once not twice
right and so then we walk through we
just have to confront the decision and
so at the end of the day
does do you believe that the product is
going to get you to where you want to go

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the way you want to get there because
that's the second part that i learned
later in sales is that some people
want to lose weight but they want to
lose weight their way um
and i'll say we learned it another time
but like for sure we found that out
because we would get people who didn't
want to sign up for membership so we'd
invite them to a free nutrition
consultation and they would spend four
times as much money on supplements as
they would on the membership because
they still wanted to eat or they didn't
want to train weight yeah yeah they just
want to lose weight they're right away
yeah so the first thing that we need to
learn
is these are the yeses that we need from
them yeah so it's like listen if you
don't have a decision i'll tell you what
the variables are right now number one
do you believe the product or service
that we have to get you to where you
want to go the way you want to get there
yes okay do you want to work with me or
us
yes or no yeah yeah like yes okay
do you know someone
who has or do you have access to the
amount of money to start the program
yes or no
if it's yes then let's go
we just made the decision together
mm-hmm how much better do you feel like
you're just like
wow okay i feel i feel much better
awesome card you want to use them and
boom so a lot of it is just the ability

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to get them to decide confront yes
exactly confront the decision and then
if someone's like still wishy-washy on
it the easiest and best questions and
sales in my opinion are what are you
afraid of
if you sign up what are you afraid of
having happen
right i lose my money or i don't lose
the weight yeah right exactly well then
what do you think would have to happen
in order for that to happen right
well i don't show up i don't do the work
yeah well then what would you need to
see in order to feel like that wasn't
going to happen because at the end of
the day you do know you need to work out
and do all this stuff to lose weight
right right okay so that's fixed so then
what would you need to see from us to
make sure that you feel good about
taking the decision because like you can
just always just take it apart and get
to the point where like you know what if
someone just texted me it's like well
that's part of the program right right
this is the weekly check-in yeah totally
and we do have that yeah what do you
know oh i didn't know that okay
fantastic let's get you because
sometimes you can't mention every single
feature you possibly have on every sale
which is one of the benefits of 101 and
one of the drawbacks right it's like you
can cater it but at the same time you
don't want to take the whole
whole time and i'll give you i'll give
everybody the audience two really easy
ones if you're starting your business
yeah number one is the reason clothes
which i use all the time which is

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whatever reason they tell you that they
don't want to do it is the very reason
they should do it like i don't want to
do it because like i think my you know
my spouse is really controlling i think
the reason that you should do it is
because your spouse is really
controlling because you need control of
your life wow i think that i don't have
time to do it i think that that's the
very reason that you should be doing
that you need to get your time back
right because you're trying to do this
business program right and currently are
you working all day they're going to say
yes because everyone thinks they're
working all day you're like you're
working all day okay well then obviously
what you're doing now isn't working
right
so the first thing we're going to do is
cut out all the stuff that's not working
and then you're going to have all this
time to do the program
that's micro so the macro is the one i
said earlier micros that's the second
one for for time there you go um
for everyone in the audience
and so with the reason close it's just
whatever reason they present with just
say totally understand you don't have
money that's the how long do you want
that to be an excuse of why you can't do
things in your life that's the very
reason you should be doing this more
than anyone right it's like when someone
says um
this is a lot of money to me right this
is really expensive and then you would
normally say like this is a lot to you
right and they say yeah like well you
know what

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that's the perfect reason to do it
because there's people every single day
who come in here and they buy this thing
and the money means nothing to them
but the thing that makes success the
thing that makes you successful
is that this is a lot of money to you
and the only reason that this won't work
is if you don't do the work and if this
means a lot to you then you're more
likely to be successful than anyone else
here wow
and so when you say that it's true yeah
and it helps overcome the because a lot
of times like i spent a lot of money
early on by percentage of my net worth
on on skills and acquisition education
and it is scary but it's 100 what you
need to do when you're starting out it's
the fastest route to getting to where
you want to go is buying the lessons
from people ahead of you
and so that's the reason clothes you can
use in all those different situations
and the other one is one that i'm
working on i'm trying to figure out like
a skeleton key for closing because it's
something like i just love this stuff
but it's like a hypothetical close
so whatever they present with
you get a hypothetical yes and then you
and then you walk backwards so
if someone's like i'm just not sure
you just say well if the program were
perfect would you do it they're like

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well yeah i would do it if it were
perfect you're like cool then what's the
difference between what we've gotten
perfect right
and usually they can't generate many
ideas anyways and they're like i don't a
lot of times they're like well i don't
know and you're like right so then it's
not that so let's talk about what's
really like worrying you what are you
afraid of right and then we can then we
can confront the real stuff right the
fears the insecurities total doubt same
thing with but like you can use that for
any of them it's like i don't have time
well if you did have time would you do
it okay well how much time would so that
if you did have so they get the yes it's
like well how much time do you think you
need and then they're gonna say
something like did you know that it's
actually one-tenth of that is what
you're actually gonna need oh i didn't
know that and we already got the yes
so they're already committed with
commitment and consistency they're
already committed to the yes that they
just said
and so it's really hard that if they
it's like cool if you have the time
would you do it
yes cool now now they gave us one
problem to solve and all we have to do
especially if you sell services yeah
it's like cool then oh so all i have to
do is solve this one problem for you
because i just got you to say yes
because you that also ties them down to
not any other objections right they
still might but it's much harder for

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them to to go back on that no yeah yeah
now one of the things that
i've heard you talk about a lot and also
you just shared right here is developing
skills and acquiring skills over over
over the last decade that's something
that i've been obsessed with since i was
a teenager is acquiring skills because i
didn't feel like i wasn't enough i
wasn't smart enough talented enough all
those things so i wanted to become
those things by acquiring those skills
and investing in them what would you say
are the three main skills if you could
only learn three to reach your first
million
what would those be well i mean the
reach the first one is you just have to
sell something to someone
so it's just sales sales it's just sales
you can just make a million just doing
sales like you don't even have to sell
your own products you can just do a
million dollars just selling right and
in order to make more in sales you sell
stuff that's more expensive that's it
like
if what is this like learn how to sell
and then find the most expensive thing
you possibly can to sell and then sell
that that's how using it that's it and
i'll tell this to everybody who's like
not sure
the more expensive it is the easier to

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02:05:00.000 --> 02:06:00.000
sell really why is that because you're
dealing with better people like you've
probably had a consulting client that
pays you 50 grand is like oh yeah by the
way i sent the wire yesterday yeah
whereas the 50 person's like well what
exactly am i going to be getting with
this program here i mean it's just it's
a different person you know i mean
you're dealing with a different avatar
and
from an actual selling perspective
almost every sale is the same regardless
so you might as well just do the sales
that you're getting paid five thousand
dollars for rather than sales you're
getting twenty dollars for right like i
learned and the the one thing that i
will say is that if you're starting out
with the intention to develop the the
skill of sales
selling the highest volume environment
possible
that's why a lot of i think some of the
best sales people are fitness people
because so many people every you know
you work at a la fitness you get 25
memberships a day that you're you're i
mean you're sitting on 25 consults a day
and i did that for five years you know
four years every now 20 plus consults
every i was an early fitness at my own
gym but like so like you get you there's
just so much unconscious competence that
you develop at that point like and those
those the time and the money like those

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02:06:00.000 --> 02:07:00.000
things become so ingrained in second
nature yeah and your language patterns
that um and it and it gives you power in
all different areas of your life
so
sales is number one you might want to
develop the skill in a high volume
environment but understand that that's
not you might make some money doing that
but the goal will then be to
sell
massive buildings sell super expensive
cars sell yachts sell jet sell you know
i mean like sell huge software packages
to enterprise software like all of these
are roles that you can make 400 a
million dollars a year doing so that's
that's where you you know you want if
you and that's a million income not even
gross that's a million income
um but if you just want to like make a
million dollars just reverse out a
million dollars and just do it looking
at daily so it's you know 3 300 a day
whatever roughly um and so at that point
it's like okay well i can sell
three 1500 things you know and i'll be
over it and i can sell one five thousand
dollar thing
i can sell you know i mean and or you
could sell
3 300 things and it's just which of

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those sounds easier they're different
you know and i will say that i have this
desire maybe in the future to like look
at some sort of entrepreneurial
personality type where like i do believe
that businesses are extension of the
entrepreneur in terms of like their
personality their thumbprint is on it
based on just how it works and so like
i've met guys who do super high volume
really low ticket transaction
um and they they're a little different
than the guys who sell ultra high ticket
like service based stuff and so yeah
it's and so i think and i've seen people
really successful on both sides um but i
do think that the more expensive the
ticket in general the the less
operational complexity there is you
still have to take if you're going to
take 10 sales calls you might might as
well make them worth all exactly
exactly right i have two final questions
for you but before i ask them i want
people to get your book it's really
inspiring 100 million offers
how to make offers so good people feel
stupid saying no which is a great
tagline as well so make sure you guys
get a few copies of this
um and also go to
acquisition.com right which is the main

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02:08:00.000 --> 02:09:00.000
business that you're running right now
acquisition.com so when's the right time
to acquire business if you're a small it
depends on whether you're going for
majority or minority that's the huge
that's the huge lever here so there's
the
what you're trying to buy and then
there's the life cycle of the business
so it's like if you're trying to buy a
majority then you want to get it before
its peak right and you want to have it
when it's already established the good
leadership team and you want to make
sure that you can pull the entrepreneur
out it still functions like that's how
we're able to sell the companies that we
had and that's what we do with
acquisition.com companies that we
actually so we buy minority minority
yeah exactly so we buy what's minorities
10 20 30 20 30 is usually the is the
stakes that like we we need to be
invested enough to care um and usually
the companies are between three and i
think 36 million is the is the biggest
one so three we don't really have any
threes i think the smallest one we have
right now is six but six million to
35-ish million is the it's kind of the
range and we have seven companies in the
portfolio and so
um
for those companies you know
we buy them because we think they can
get better we think we can grow them and
we think that we can put a team in place

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02:09:00.000 --> 02:10:00.000
and we can
transition from face-based branding to a
brand-based business so that it is
sellable and then what happens is
interesting there is that we might
triple the revenue the business but we
might 30x the enterprise value because
it's not valuable if you're just
you know johnny johnny teacher or
whatever which we do mostly internet
businesses because we know how to
transition from being the personality
brand who teaches some sort of niche
skill like we talked about earlier
into
teaching the same thing but being like
salon university or being plumber u or
gym launch you know like those are all
like very specific niche skills that
provide real value that's history um two
people so we're almost the entire
portfolio except for one is e-learning
um and that's because we're huge
education people i like the business i
also like the impact the market
yeah i love the cash flow it's a low
capex business it it's very inflation
responsive in that like we can always
adjust prices very easily um
it has there's there's real impact on
people's lives compared to like a
four-year degree you've got a great

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02:10:00.000 --> 02:11:00.000
price anchor and alternative and i think
the education my thesis is that
education is becoming increasingly
fragmented just like media has and it's
just catching up the fact that all of
these quote gurus exist
is a telltale sign that more and more
people are not going to college because
they don't see the value and i think
they're right in that in that assessment
and so rather than spend a hundred
thousand two hundred thousand dollars or
four years or fifty thousand dollars
over four years you could spend a a a
quarter of that
way more yeah a way more tactical
training that can replace your entire
income and so um
in terms of for us we we look for
companies that are growing that are cash
flow positive that are typically
e-learning or internet businesses that
have that have really good products so
ideally somebody who really knows who is
good at the thing that they teach which
is silly but you also know that there's
lots of people who don't have that and
if we have those things we on average
triple the profit of the business within
a year anyway so we're very like when we
have the when we have our very narrowly
defined avatar which is doing three
million or more so 250 a month or higher
um that's just to be considered usually
they're at like the usually like
five to a million a month 500 000 a

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02:11:00.000 --> 02:12:00.000
month is usually when you take them on
um
that's
that's our sweet spot and then we can
buy it we can ramp them and then
um with regards to majority it kind of
goes back to like i personally i think
long term we're going to try and figure
out a way to maybe raise a fund so i can
help all of the founders
take some cash on the table and maybe do
some sort of
conglomeration thing because it's all
you're learning which would be cool or
you know we might have them sell off
individually
it's really up to the founder because
we're and this is kind of cool for me
because like i'm really just there to
support them um and we recruit the key
players for them and because we have the
reputation we have we have so much more
reach and leverage we can find the
people that will help them so much
easier than they can and so that's how
we can build these things into
enterprises so quickly and we can get
outsized returns and so that's that's
what we do that's cool and do you guys
teach also how people can acquire a
company on your site as well we don't no
the the the courses on the site
correspond with the books so the book
has a free course that comes with it
it's on the site you can go through it

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as all the downloads everything the book
the ebook is 99 cents on kindle yup i
think it has it has five thousand i
think five star reviews on amazon um
who's counting you know anybody yeah
who's good
um it's but it's 99 cents i wanted to
make it exactly for anyone i think that
the hard copy is a little more yeah um
but you know i wanted to like i've got
people from like nigeria
being like i could afford this thing so
much so that's um and i know they're
probably never going to be on
acquisition.com right right um but yeah
if you're a ua space company and you're
elearning we're always happy to see how
we can do it we'll have to have you come
on next another time if you guys want
wanted to come back on to talk about how
to acquire a smaller company
and teach that process then let me know
in the comments below on youtube uh if
you're interested in learning that but
acquisition.com alex for mosey
on instagram twitter
and youtube your youtube is blown up
your facebook as well but you're doing
what daily almost daily youtube now you
shorts shorts yeah we do the shorts
daily on instagram tic tac

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02:13:00.000 --> 02:14:00.000
youtube uh we're on twitter we have a
podcast that's actually grown a lot oh
wow yeah it's it's what's the podcast
called i don't even know the game the
game okay i see more your youtube stuff
yeah it's the game yeah the game is the
podcast it's just me just just talk
about whatever check that out it's
they're they're same style as youtube in
terms of short short share like
10-minute stuff yeah exactly and yeah
then we also have the linkedin we're
we're we're everywhere i'm trying to be
louisiana twitter twitter's everybody
the twitters yeah the twitterverse and
the metaverse i love it yes make sure
you follow you everywhere we'll have it
all linked up this is a question i asked
everyone at the end called the three
truths so imagine it is your last day
and maybe you've surpassed 85 maybe
you're 120 or something extended to life
as long as you can
and uh you've lived your life you've
accomplished the things you want to even
though they don't matter anymore
you've made all the money but you've
given it all away because it doesn't
matter anymore
um
and no one has access to your content or
information for whatever reason it goes
with you everything
the books the videos all this stuff goes

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02:14:00.000 --> 02:15:00.000
with you this interview is gone
uh and you can only share three things
with the world three lessons that you've
learned from your entire life yeah what
would be those three lessons or three
truths that you would share
give first and without expectation
and you'll get more than you can imagine
in all
aspects of life
one
if you can't do it forever
don't do it for a day and probably
something to the extent of
if nothing matters
then you get to decide what matters so
use the power wisely mm-hmm that's good
man i want to acknowledge you alex for
your
growth and your and your ego death
and the constant journey of that yes i'm
sure you know i'm on the same journey
um
and it's uh but your acknowledgement of
it your ability to look yourself in the
mirror and see okay here's what's
working what's not working and how do i
continue to develop that
and now you're this stage where it
really feels like you're trying to

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create add as much value as possible to
as many people as possible yeah through
your books your content and your
information so i really acknowledge you
for the the example you're creating for
your
your really uniqueness you're being a
hundred percent who you are i mean
you're in like the basement with your
wife either with like just like you
don't care
necessarily about what you look or
whatever you know you just want to add
the value and not think about what are
people saying about me but how can i
make it about others which i think is
really inspiring uh example that you're
leading from so i want to acknowledge
you for that man and um hopefully we'll
have you back on for more times
but uh final question what's your
definition of greatness
when reality exceeds expectations
oh man alex thanks
good stuff good stuff you end up broke
you end up struggling financially and
you you can never figure out why so the
first thing is
what is it that you want to achieve in
your life financially
and then you have to go out and figure
it out yourself because unfortunately

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school will never teach you the stuff so
you didn't learn this in high school or
university of michigan or no

