https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGHbp0Vr1dQ

1 00:00:00.000 --\> 00:01:00.000 in this video i want to talk to you
about the growth uh that i had to go through as an entrepreneur going
from zero to 85 million dollars a year um and one of the things that i
decided to stop doing which is going home for the holidays and i want to
explain the decision making process around this and this comes from this
is an older video that i did release into a smaller community and in
that group uh i can see the best performing videos um and out of 300
plus videos this is among the top uh performing and so uh people seem to
very much like this and as we're going into the holidays at least the
time i'll me posting this i thought it would be timely but it really
doesn't matter what holiday uh you were you're celebrating it's really a
video about how to navigate our pasts and use them to walk with strength
and conviction into the future that we choose to create and a lot of
time it comes from shedding old identities and learning how to unspeak
the things that were spoken over us in our childhood from our parents
from our friends those who do not understand the path that you're trying
to go on as an entrepreneur those who think that what

2 00:01:00.000 --\> 00:02:00.000 you're doing is stupid those who do
like who just don't believe um and at the end of the day we need to
believe and we also need to create conditions that are conducive to the
goals that we have in our lives and so this video gives you the most
tactical raw breakdown of how i did it and i got so many people who told
me that the video changed their lives in terms of how they approached uh
their pasts and the people and the relationships that they maintain
there and how to protect their space tactically in a way that will give
you the um the attention back to allocate towards the things that matter
so uh moseynation uh i hope you enjoyed the video like i said i i have
nothing to sell you this is just uh because i love entrepreneurs and i
want you to crush it there's a lot of people who are broke and i want
you to be one of them see you in the vid good morning happy saturday i'm
really excited for this because i've actually had this concept on my
mind this piece probably for the last two and a half weeks so i feel
like it's been like in the back of my mind like percolating and whatnot
and it's combining with like four or five other ones and i like felt

3 00:02:00.000 --\> 00:03:00.000 it this morning as i was eating
breakfast i was like all right today's the day i'm gonna make it but
recently i wanted to call this why don't go home for the holidays
there's probably going to be some things that i say that are a little
bit controversial but there are things that have have absolutely been
some of the keys to our continued growth and success and i thought you
might want to hear them and so i put the title as this for at least for
right now as success equals ingrained intolerance so one of the reasons
that i don't go home for the holidays is that a lot of people haven't
haven't grown since i left right they they haven't had 10 years of
growth they've lived the same six months 20 times right since i was gone
and when i go back they want to meet me in my past and so they want to
speak things over me that aren't who i am anymore and then because it's
difficult for them to connect right the their perception of who i used
to be and who the person is standing in front of them how they are
reconciled thank you um reconciling those two things is really

4 00:03:00.000 --\> 00:04:00.000 difficult for a lot of people because
it's breaking the box they want to put you in but the reality is that
most people don't change entrepreneurs do because we have to right we
call it growth instead of change but for the outside world for the
non-entrepreneurs who stay in their same box every day it's it's it's
hard to calculate and so i'll go home and they'll say like my dad says
this he'll say you have a you have the shortest views out of anyone you
just have such a short temper anyone who is in our company my wife like
i mean anyone who knows me and spends time with me would probably not
say that and so i will be i mean very aggressive in combating that
immediately because i'll be like don't speak that over me that's not
true that's not who i am and it makes people really uncomfortable and so
there's a lot of times if i go see an uncle you know what i mean if i'm
at a holiday event and then they're like oh alexander you've always been
a little bit loose with the alcohol like i don't even drink anymore you
know what i mean like you're speaking about my

5 00:04:00.000 --\> 00:05:00.000 past and it makes people really
uncomfortable and i would implore you to meet those things head-on and
the reason that i don't like going home for the holidays because i have
to be on guard because when i when i leave i feel like i have to like
wash myself of the things that people were trying to speak over me and
it's constant it's un it's unending it's incessant right they're
constantly trying to put me back in the box that makes sense to them i
refuse to have that happen and so when i have these conversations it's
it's passing comments it's little things it's never because most people
aren't confrontational right and so it's never oh like you are like you
don't mean like it's it's not like that but it's just like oh you know
how you always are and they'll say it even with like a smile like it's
like it's a good thing but like you have to catch it because you know
how it makes you feel when you hear it you're like that's not true
that's not me right i'm i'm done with that that's in my past right and
so like this is who i

6 00:05:00.000 --\> 00:06:00.000 am so i have to take like a week to
detangle and then basically re-speak over the things that i am or that i
choose to be it's one of the main reasons that i don't go back for the
holidays and i really really don't like it and i definitely don't like
spending any portion of extended time there is because it feels like i'm
going backwards you know what we are all as a community trying to
accomplish is not normal and we just have to come to terms with the fact
that it isn't normal it's okay that it's not normal but it also means
that normal people aren't gonna like it the higher up we go in business
i think at least this is just my subjective understanding of how i'm how
i'm perceiving it as i go through it the more intolerant we become of
people who try and i mean it's even tones like i'll be like don't speak
to me in that tone even if they're saying that i think i'm like it seems
disrespectful it bothers me and like you become more and more aware
because you're like let me teach you how to treat me right and sometimes
you have to do that and especially when it's been a long

7 00:06:00.000 --\> 00:07:00.000 period of time you have to teach people
how you like to be treated now and a lot of times it's a lot different
than it was when they first met you right and it's the hardest with
family because i'll be really real with you there's a lot of people that
i'm connected with that i probably would never see again if i didn't
have a blood relation i manage our space very well if we you know if we
go back it's only going to be for a short period of time because there's
no other reason besides the fact that we share a biological bond that i
would ever see you again because you haven't you don't have the same
goals you don't have the same values you don't want to do the things i
want to do when we see each other you make me feel worse why would i see
you right i'm just being very real with you guys and maybe this is
something that i'll look back at this video five years from now and i'll
have grown more and i'll have more perspective but that's that's where
we are now being so intolerant of this stuff is like is so key to being
able to like grow i'm telling you because and that's why that's why
there's just we keep such quiet space right because it's like the only
place that you don't have to have your guard up constantly fending off

8 00:07:00.000 --\> 00:08:00.000 what other people are trying to tell
you about yourself right and so you can kind of build it while it's
while it's in its infancy and you're not as strong yet in these new
attributes that you're trying to have i was talking to a high-level
entrepreneur uh yesterday who's like ah i mean i'm just horrible at
details and i was like don't speak that over yourself i was like because
your business might need you to be good at details when you go from 10
to 20 million don't say that and he was like you're right i was like
yeah you choose you're choosing to not be good at details do you really
think that if your kids were going to die like because you needed to
learn to remember things to be able to do it like well yeah i'm like all
right then you're choosing to not be good at it that's your choice
that's your belief right and so like if you identify these things like
man i'm getting really deep on this i know but like the identity is so
fluid we can change in an instant like tony robbins talks about this
stuff all the time like the only moment that we're actually able to live
in is right now right and so all of the things that we had before us are
only stories that we can either choose to replay because they're
positive attributes or choose to ignore if

9 00:08:00.000 --\> 00:09:00.000 they're negative attributes and a lot
of us just stay in these loops of of speaking these these things over
ourselves that don't even serve us right one of my favorite sayings in
the world probably one of my favorites like one of the most profound
sayings is we question all of our beliefs except for those that we truly
believe and those we never question at all and i always i love that
because it just makes you aware of like i love catching myself on a
belief that i've always had that i believe so thoroughly that i never
actually thought to question it because that's how much i believed it
right it's just been there and so like the higher up we go the more we
kind of uncover these beliefs about what's possible what can we do how
can we grow how quickly can change happen you look at our business right
like we pivoted from a done 40 model to the done with you model that we
have now in april of 2017 right and so from april of 2017 until today
right that's like 19 months i think

10 00:09:00.000 --\> 00:10:00.000 right we've gone from zero to arguably
the biggest company in fitness like in in the brick and mortar gym
fitness world and we're like two or three times the size of anyone else
who's like the second runner up 2019 we're gonna probably three to four
x that i can say that pretty with a lot of certainty and so like how
quickly are you able to achieve what you want to achieve is it supposed
to take a year because you're choosing to believe that it's supposed to
take a year how quickly can you onboard someone let me give you another
story we're about to do a very big launch for our legacy group i can't
tell you what it is but a friend of mine launched a new service category
in his business and it blew up overnight he had a huge explosion of
traffic he was running like some ads and they just took off right he
couldn't do anything about it and so he hired 30 people in 14 days for
his customer service team 30 people in 14 days and so when we had our q4
planning right our fourth quarter planning we had our customer service
director and i and lily i love you to death it has nothing to do but
like this was what happened during the during the actual meeting she was

11 00:10:00.000 --\> 00:11:00.000 like i feel comfortable saying that i
can bring four people on every month between now and ex-launch date
right which would you know get us to probably 16 or so people 16 to 20
right by the launch date which is gonna be like three or four months
away and so then i told that story about my friend who had just done
this he hired 30 people in 14 days because he had to and so a lot of
times the necessity is one of the biggest things that allows us to break
our beliefs because we have to we have no other choice and that's why
when we have scripts and whatnot and the the show rates double based on
the fact that you know you actually are going to leave a location and
you're not going to be able to sell that person the tonality of how
you're speaking to the prospect even though the words are the same the
fact that it's just what you believe that changes the outcome and the
influence on the other person is like so cool to me and so the question
is like how can we trick ourselves into believing what we need to
believe in order to grow faster i did this experiment you know three
years ago where i put on like 35 pounds of muscle in six weeks right and
i started and they asked me to write an article it's muscle and strength
and i did it natural

12 00:11:00.000 --\> 00:12:00.000 you can choose to believe me or not
but i did it wasn't their five pounds of muscle but it was 35 pounds and
a lot of it was muscle um within six weeks and i started the article off
by saying like what if you actually had to gain 35 pounds in six weeks
and get and add 100 pounds to your batch what would you do and so i
tried to put this conf like these confines on myself and i was like i
probably wouldn't just lift one you know twice a week right for that
lift i'd probably lift it like once or twice a day and then that's what
i did and then i got really really strong really fast i added 100 pounds
to my pitch in six weeks and i was natural right and i did that because
of the confine like the confines that we put ourselves under and so
sometimes i wonder like what things are we allowing to be spoken over
ourselves by others first and then second what things are we speaking
over ourselves that we don't even know that we're doing constantly
questioning like those things that we speak over ourselves has been
honestly one of the biggest things that has allowed us to grow i know
that i haven't been as tactical in the last few content

13 00:12:00.000 --\> 00:13:00.000 videos i hope you guys don't mind um
it's just been what's on my mind um we had chris and rob and barnett who
flew out here because they won a competition that we were holding in
secret anyway so chris and robin barnett came out and they were like we
feel like we're stuck right we feel like we're in a bottleneck and like
we just can't we're just trying to break through and um when i talked to
them about it i um the whole time they were here for the whole day i
didn't tell them a single tactical thing to do differently with their
business not one but what we identified was the things that they were
speaking over themselves and the things that they were choosing to
believe about how quickly things can happen right and so i'll give you
an example i hope they don't mind robin his chris's wife didn't want to
be in the gym anymore she's like it's not my passion you know like i cut
like now we're comfortable like i kind of want to do my own thing and so
um and it was causing some strife in their relationship mostly because
like you know she felt you know betrothed to him that she had to keep
doing it but then he felt guilty that she know what i mean there's just
kind of both sides of it

14 00:13:00.000 --\> 00:14:00.000 right um and so they were like well
we're gonna let robin go you know she's gonna leave in four months right
so we're gonna get four months um and then she'll get out of the
business and i was like why didn't she just get out today like she
doesn't want to do it you don't want her there like why don't you just
get out today like why are you choosing to believe that it needs to take
four months you know like i guess it doesn't i was like right and so a
lot of times like i've just this has just been recently for me i've had
a lot of conversations with guys who are doing five to 12 million a year
in their businesses and a lot of them have been doing this a lot longer
than me and they're like how have you freaking grown so if like how are
you hitting the numbers you're hitting how is the growth rate that you
guys are having like how is it possible right and like we've really just
like i've tried not to be weird about this but like we've just chosen to
believe it's possible we've really just chosen to believe it's possible
and a lot of times like if you talk to them and it's like you see these
guys who are really really really high up in the business world a lot of
times they do talk very

15 00:14:00.000 --\> 00:15:00.000 non-tactical very much mindset stuff
and i think it's and i used to really not appreciate it but now i think
i'm appreciating it a little bit more because the reason that a lot of
people aren't successful is because of the beliefs that they have
because if you can remove and break those beliefs a lot of times they
will go find the tactics that are necessary right to win and the higher
up you go the hot like the cleaner people keep their space and the
reason they do that the reason they keep it so quiet is so that they can
pinpoint anything that comes in their area right anything that's gonna
break or ch chip at them or just like bother them in any way to keep
this bubble around them and then what that does though is that it gives
them such clean perspective and clean vision on what's going on because
a lot of times when i have these guys like i said you were doing you
know five six ten million a year and they're like what's going on it
becomes really obvious it's really it's it's really apparent i'll give
you another example i had yesterday i talked to a guy who's doing um
he's doing half a million a month right now and he has it split between
two businesses he's got one business does like 400 000 a month he's

16 00:15:00.000 --\> 00:16:00.000 got one that does a a hundred thousand
a month and he's like well the big you know the 400 000 a month business
is my old business um it's the one that it's it's got all the complexity
in it i hate the customers all this stuff right and then he's like and
then this business is really simple it's super profitable i'm running
like three times the margin i run in that business and um and he's like
so i just i just can't figure out how to grow and i was like do you
really can't figure out how to grow he's like yeah just like i got so
much stuff going on and i was like yeah you should probably just get rid
of the thing that is a big headache for you and do the thing that you
really like doing i was like do you think if you got rid of all of the
attention that that 400 000 month thing is sucking up you'd be able to
double the hundred thousand one thing he's like yeah like easy and i was
like cool then why don't you do that right and it becomes really
apparent and obvious to you on the outside like i mean these guys aren't
dumb you know what i mean he's doing 6 million like he's not stupid it's
just the beliefs that we truly believe are the ones that

17 00:16:00.000 --\> 00:17:00.000 we don't see and so it's really
interesting and like i think all the time like i want to be wiser i want
to have more discernment and if you really if you start to dissect like
what is wisdom right wisdom is being able to see is if two people are
looking at the same situation the wiser person sees things that the
other person doesn't and so it's it's vision it's being able to see what
other people don't see and a lot of times they're just unseen chains
that people have already chosen to tie themselves up with right and
we're having a lot of gemini's i've had just recently a string of gym
owners stopping like man we're just stuck at 60 000 a month like i don't
know what this bottleneck is and i always respond i'm like it's not the
business model right it's you and it's and it's and i should probably
respond more specifically it's a belief that you have that you haven't
identified yet that's holding you back a lot of times it's just because
you're choosing to make less money like no joke a lot of people choose
to make less money so people like we have gym owners right now who are
asked like

18 00:17:00.000 --\> 00:18:00.000 hey like i've got this campaign it's
crushing it i think i'm going to turn it off for next month right
because like we have a lot going on i'm like if you want to choose to
make less money that's your choice you know and so we make these choices
if you if you were to articulate them differently you'd probably think
they were ridiculous and i had every conversation i've had just in the
last two weeks i've talked to four entrepreneurs last two weeks they
were doing five million or more per year and each one of the
conversations ended with like well when you put it like that i sound
like an idiot and i was like well are you it's like well no and i was
like then you should probably change the way you're doing it and so it's
just these emotions and these beliefs that get in our way of like what
is seems so obvious and it's just because some we are emotional beings
right we are we make decisions with emotions and we try and logic it
later but when you look at things logically a lot of times some of the
the answers are obvious well i've got this trainer that i've had for two
years but they're such a pain they never want to do anything of the
anything that's new but i have some clients that that still like them
okay do you think that if you had a new trainer that was like bought in

19 00:18:00.000 --\> 00:19:00.000 that you would be able to grow more so
what it is is the fear of losing these few clients that are attached to
this one trainer is outweighing the potential growth you would have from
the key player that you know you need in order to make the model work
and then when it's phrased that way it becomes obvious yeah i gotta let
them go but you don't have the perspective yet until sometimes you just
need someone on the outside but anyways guys um thank you for spending
saturday morning with me this was just something that was on my mind and
i just like it was like stirring in me but be mindful of the things that
speak people speak over you and the tone that they do it and just like
if you feel weird after someone says something stop the conversation
catch it and then address it and be like please don't speak to me like
that please don't say those things about me it really bothers me i'm
really working on this or i've worked a lot on this and i don't i don't
appreciate it it really bothers me and if that person cares about you
they will change and if they don't get them out of your life you don't
need that and the most important person to make sure that you're doing
that with is you like if you're the one who's saying man

20 00:19:00.000 --\> 00:20:00.000 i'm just not good at details man i'm
just i'm just i hate employees good luck running a business these are
things i overhear even in our group like ah employees are idiots i'm
like do you really think that that is a good belief to grow and repeat
inside of yourself if you want to grow and scale a business probably not
right like be mindful of the things that you're saying because and then
ask yourself like does this belief serve and if it doesn't get rid of it
so anyways i hope you guys have an amazing weekend um i love you all
thank you guys for for for giving me your attention i know it's your
most valuable resource so thank you i hope i gave you a good return on
it and i hope you guys have an amazing amazing day all right lots of
love bye
